In the Rough
by tinderbliss
Summary: While Naomi would never admit it, she's struggling. When given the opportunity to take a break from life, she finds herself in a place she never imagined she would be. Among the horrors she faces she meets some pretty incredible people, with some unbelievable stories. Naomily
1. Admitted - Naomi, Pt 1

**A/N:**

**After far too much lurking I've decided to finally contribute to our happy little community. This story has been banging around in my head for awhile and won't seem to let up.**

**First a bit of a warning; I am American. (Are y'all scared yet?!) As such, I bastardize the English language regularly - sorry about that. Secondly, I do not know anything about the mental health system in the UK, so what you are about to read may make very little sense but I am happy to answer any questions.**

* * *

**Naomi's POV**

I'm not sure when exactly things went tits' up. I mean I suppose it was when... well, yeah. It doesn't matter so much now. Not when I'm _here_. God, how can I possibly be _here_? It all sounded so lovely... a break, a rest...

"_Naomi, I'd like you to consider something," Dr. Ambrose leans forward in his chair and places his elbows on his lap, lacing his fingers together, "How would you feel about taking a bit of a break?"_

"_A break? Like from college?" I scoff._

"_Yes, actually... but also to get away for a bit... how would you feel about that?"_

"_A bit busy at the moment, yeah? Revising and all? Can't exactly go on a holiday, can I?"_

"_Even for just a couple days? Might even help you to focus... a clearer head for your work..."_

_I considered that for several moments, "And where exactly would I be going?"_

People don't like to say exactly what they mean. They prefer to prettify things, make them sound better. Why don't they just bloody say what they mean? Why can't we just call things what they are? I ponder this as I sit in a chair and take in my surroundings. I suppose the building is rather lovely, what with the large house sitting on a good bit of property and a sizable lake in the distance. From the outside, one would think it an old manor turned luxury hotel or spa. From the outside you imagine a home filled with nick-knacks collected over time. You wouldn't think that every single item residing in it's walls was selected with the greatest of care and intention – that every single _occupant_ was selected with this same care. And here I sit, the newest occupant... no, patient – the newest patient – and try to process that I'm actually here. Why I'm currently sat waiting for my Mum to finish signing the documents that will cement this stay. Waiting for me to be officially admitted to Delfino House, a mental hospital.

I look down at my hands that are trembling just slightly and put them under my legs, "Relax, Naomi," I tell myself.

"You should probably avoid doing that here."

I look up and my eyes are met with a lanky brunette with piercing blue eyes, "Huh?"

She smirks before shrugging and walking away, "Talking to yourself..."

I'm still looking at the place where the girl has just left as Ramona, a strict looking nurse with a smile a little too big to be genuine, approaches with my Mum, "Alright love, let's get you settled in then."

I am taken beyond a large wooden door, leaving reception and led into a small room with an empty table and floor to ceiling locked cupboards. Ramona puts on a pair of gloves and looks over to my Mum expectantly and smiles as Gina hands over my carry-all. She unzips the bag and begins to take out a jumper before I grab the bag from her.

"Pardon!" I growl as I stuff the garment back inside.

I'm met with a condescending smile, "Dear, we need to look through your belongings and make sure everything's... appropriate." She reaches out her hand and takes the bag adding, "It's procedure."

She takes out my tops and folds them into a neat pile before starting on the jeans, "I'm sorry these will have to go with your Mum."

"Uh... _why_?"

"I'm afraid we don't allow residents to have metal objects of any sort," she answers while tapping on a brass button.

I look at my Mum with an incredulous look that turns into a scowl, "Fuck sakes..."

In the end I am left with a jumper, a few t-shirts, two pair of yoga pants and a pull-over hoodie which has been liberated of it's strings – inappropriate apparently. Also removed were my toiletries, lighter, iPod, two spiral notebooks and three packets of Garibaldis my Mum must have snuck into my bag before we left.

The items I _am_ allowed are placed in a plastic tray on the table whilst my Mum is given the supposed contraband.

"You'll need to change into some of these garments whilst I look through the clothing you're currently wearing," Ramona explains.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"Well nothing I can see from here dear, but some of our residents "forget" to leave contraband at home."

I roll my eyes before selecting some grey yoga pants and a shirt from the pile on the table and begin to walk out of the room before Ramona stops me.

"I'll need you to change in here. Don't worry dear, I've seen it all before," she adds.

I huff as I place the clothing on the table and take my top off, handing it to her. She takes the t-shirt and runs her gloved hands along the seams before adding it to the pile on the tray. I watch this as I lean over to untie my shoes and shimmy out of my jeans. As suspected my jeans are confiscated and my shoes are relieved of their offending laces.

"I'll need to check your undergarments now."

I look at her disbelievingly and cross my arms over my chest, "I think you'll find you need to stay well and truly away from my undergarments."

She sighs, "Turn around and let me have a look at you, no use prolonging this."

My Mum looks at me apologetically before encouraging me, "Go on then, love."

I close my eyes, exhale gruffly and place my now fisted hands against my sides and spin around, "Alright?"

"Yes, now please pull your bra forwards and away from your chest."

I place my thumbs underneath the band and pull it away from my body.

"Shake it a bit, please."

I look over at my mum and mouth out "perve" as I follow Ramona's directions and Gina stifles a laugh.

Once Ramona is satisfied that there are no wires or other apparent WMD's hidden in my knickers, I am allowed to change into my mental clinic acceptable attire.

"Alright Naomi, time to say goodbye to your Mum and show you to your room."

"Oh, already? So soon?" My mother looks over at me with a frown before pulling me into a bone-crushing hug.

"Jesus, Mum... oxygen _is_ critical to survival you know," I say as I push against her arms. She ignores my rebuff and places her hands around my face and looks at me with tear filled eyes and says, "I'm really fucking proud of you, you know."

I snort as I turn away from her, "Yeah, well that's hardly the thing to say to your daughter as you commit her."

She sighs, "Darling, we've discussed this... I thought you agreed it would be good for you and-"

"I know... it's just not exactly how I imagined it would be..."

"Delfino House comes highly recommended and Dr. Ambrose wouldn't suggest it if he didn't think it could help you."

"I don't need help Mum – I just need a _break_."

Gina sighs as she pushes some overgrown fringe behind my ear, "Then take this break. Please Naomi. I worry about you _so_ much and I don't know how to help you... you won't let me in, you won't talk about it and I-"

_We are so not going there. _"Okay, okay," I interrupt, raising my hands in defeat. I lean my head back and look up at the ceiling and then back down at my Mum before adding, "But _only_ for 72 hours, yeah?"

My mum nods as she wraps her arms around me again and kisses my forehead, "Yes, only a few days, love."

* * *

I'll give them credit, they are certainly attempting to make this place seem as in-clinical as possible. I am led to the bedroom that I will be staying in. It's a nicely sized room with a large plexi-glass window overlooking the pretty grounds. Two twin beds are placed on opposite sides of the room with two small wooden dressers on either side, acting as nightstands.

Ramona motions between the beds,"You may take whichever bed you like, there is no other resident sharing with you at the moment."

I nod and take the left-most bed, dropping the plastic tray with my belongings onto it.

"They go in here," she says as she opens a drawer of the dresser. As she does so, I realize with a laugh that it isn't wood at all but some faux-wood finished plastic shit. _Jesus, what else is fake around here?_

"_Everything_ has it's place Naomi... I think you'll soon see that."

"Uh, right."

Ramona looks around the room and smiles before consulting a clipboard, "You will meet with your doctor at 1:10pm today. Lunch is served at noon, followed by afternoon Group at 2:00pm," she looks at her watch before continuing, "It's free time now. Most residents spend it in the Common Room, however, you can gain privileges that will offer more choices. Come along now, let's go meet your new friends."

Friends? Ha fucking ha. Not only do I dislike the prospect of making friends with the loonies here, but I find her condescending tone to be rather insulting. As if she's come up with this idea that once you place all the crazies together they should hit it off straight away as they wipe the drool dribbling from each other's faces and occupy themselves with each other. I smirk at the image as I am led to the Common Room.

I am met with an expansive and sunny room with nearly floor to ceiling windows. Tables are spread throughout with bookshelves lining the far wall and a nurse's station situated in a corner with what looks like a locked storage room. Couches and chairs are placed in several areas with once again, a homey and comfortable aesthetic in mind.

My eyes scan the room cautiously attempting to avoid eye contact with anyone. I survey the room and find less about a dozen or so people in what looks like varying degrees of boredom and/or awareness. _Okay, so this is what crazy people look like. _It's actually not as bad as I thought... they look normal enough. My eyes continue their surveillance and momentarily pause on a girl sitting in a window seat, maybe a year or two younger than me who is talking to her reflection animatedly. _Yeah, no. This isn't going to work. I can't be here._ I turn to Ramona and open my mouth to say so, but am reminded of my Mum. _She thinks I should be here. _I close my mouth and turn my head back towards the room, in resignation.

"So what are we meant to do during Free Time?"

"You're in luck, we were just about to start a positively _enthralling_ game of Monopoly," says the brunette from earlier with a sickly sweet smile as she walks towards us.

"That sounds lovely, thank you Effy. Naomi would _love_ to join in, isn't that right?" Ramona asks in a way that is very clear that whether Naomi wants to play or not is entirely irrelevant. The nurse takes the opportunity to make her leave with a gentle pat on Naomi's shoulder.

Effy watches as Romana exits before cocking her head in question as her smile turns into a smirk, "Yes, do join in Naomi. You wouldn't want to hurt Panda's feelings would you?"

_What. The. Fuck. Great... Window Girl talks to herself and this chick sees pandas?!_ "Uhhh, right... I - " My attempt at making an excuse is interrupted by a high pitched squeal emanating from a blonde in pigtails who takes both my hands into hers while bouncing up and down, not unlike an overexcited chihuahua, "You're here! Finally! Took ages!"

Here's the thing. I don't like people invading my personal space. My bubble. Mine. And I _definitely_ don't like people touching me... particularly strangers. Batshit crazy blonde strangers even more so.

I look to Effy for help from the ongoing attack but unless Effy can produce a smirk that will obliterate the blonde, I am well and truly fucked. I all but surrender into the bouncing and shrieking before Effy mercifully deems it fit to rescue me, "Panda, why don't you ask Ingrid if you can check out a game?"

"Whizzer idea, Eff," she answers as she removes herself from my person and skips away to the nurse's station. And I'm dead serious. She _skips_.

I look at Effy and point to the departing blonde in relief, "So... _that's_ Panda!"

She frowns and purses her lips in offense, "What? Did you think I was crazy or something?"

_Good God, Naomi! Do not piss off potentially violent and homicidal teenage girls._ I shake my head, "No, no, no... no. I..." I stammer and try to decipher the look on her face whilst visibly checking for items I could potentially be shanked with, when I see a slight turn of her lip. _Is she... is she joking?_ We stare at each other for a few seconds before she cracks a smile and we both burst out laughing.

* * *

Effy leads me to an unoccupied table positioned next to a window overlooking a paved courtyard with benches and a stone fountain. A man is sat on one of the benches with a lit cigarette hanging out of his mouth and a book in his hands. I watch him in pure and undiluted jealousy. _God I would kill for a fag right now. _As if hearing my thoughts, the man looks up at me and nods in greeting with a smile. I turn my head around without acknowledgment. Jesus, I was perving on his cigarette not him.

Effy pulls a battered deck of cards from her pocket. "So, how long are you in for?"

I scoff at what I assume is a typical question asked in prisons, and apparently mental institutions. "Not long, just a couple days – 72 hours actually."

She silently shuffles the cards for a minute before looking up at me and responding. "Right. Well Panda will sure be disappointed."

"Yeah? Why's that?"

"She just likes to meet new people is all, " she shrugs before adding, "She's been here for quite a while..."

I look over at the blonde talking to a nurse who is patting her on the shoulder and handing her a cup of green gelatin and can't help but wonder what horrible condition has kept her here so long.I look back at Effy who is staring at Panda with what I can only define as fondness, before moving her eyes to meet mine.

"I don't know." she answers my unasked question. She begins to lay out cards in front of us, "Egyptian Ratscrew?" she asks, and I know the conversation has ended.

* * *

My assumption that lunch would consist of reheated frozen shit served on plastic trays is shattered entirely when I enter a large dining room with wooden tables filled with heaping bowls and platters of fresh food.

"Hogwarts much?"

Effy laughs, "Just a bit, yeah," and motions her head to follow her. We sit at the far end of an empty table facing the doorway. "The good doctor believes in the benefits of family style dining and all that," she explains as she reaches for the bowl of potatoes and plops a spoonful on her plate and mine. "Vegetarian, right?"

I frown, "...yeah. How'd you know that?"

"Who, Effy? She knows _everything_, don't you Eff? A proper mind reader, she is." Pandora smiles brightly as she begins to pile her plate without discrimination. Panda says this with such simple honesty and not a hint of sarcasm I can only nod in response. I tuck into my meal and look at the large clock above a non functioning fireplace. 12:19pm. I've been here nearly three hours._ Just 69 more and I'll be home... _

"Where do you suppose the lads are?" Pandora asks with a mouth full of chicken.

"Cook's still on Restriction, Freddie's in the studio and I imagine JJ is en route to the Dining Hall but stuck counting steps... or paintings... or perhaps backtracking altogether. He should be along soon."

"JJ gets locked on to things, you see?" Pandora says in way of explanation.

"Hmm?"

It is at this moment that a boy around our age with curly hair and braces approaches our table. He removes a handkerchief from his pocket and begins to wipe down the table and seat before sitting down. He removes his rucksack and places it on the bench next to him and takes out a bagged lunch.

"JJ! JJ! JJ! Guess what?"

"Oh, hello Pandora," he responds politely.

"We have a new friend!" Pandora squeals while pointing in my direction, "Look!"

The boy turns his head in what I can only describe as a robotic motion and looks at me before smiling and offering his hand, "My name is Jonah Jeremiah Jones, but most people find it a mouthful and thusly call me JJ – which you may also do, if it pleases you." I take his hand and he shakes it once before returning it to his lap where he uses his handkerchief and wipes his hands rather furiously.

Pandora watches him with a frown, "Rough day, Jay?"

He opens his mouth and thinking better of it, settles for a nod. He takes a yoghurt out of his lunch bag and peels off the lid. He takes a spoon and scrapes off the yoghurt from the lid and doesn't stop until the thin piece of foil is spotless. He then folds it and places it in his pocket. O_ookay, I'm pretty sure Ramona would consider that contraband and would confiscate it with a swiftness and a brutal smile. _I look to Effy and she shrugs and then to Pandora who is suddenly very interested with playing with her green beans.

"I'm about finished now. I can throw that in the bin if you like?"

JJ concentrates on the task of eating his yoghurt and dismisses me with a shake of his head. I look to Effy for help, but she shakes her head subtly, telling me no. _Okay, so I'm assuming this is normal then. _I sigh and finish my lunch in silence.

* * *

It's not that I'm keen on following the rules, quite the contrary really. But, I just don't see anything good coming from hiding bits of metal – flimsy as it may be – in a place like this.

"So, what was that back there?"

We are back in the Common Room and sat on a couch cross-legged, facing each other with some cards between us. Pandora is still in the Dining Hall procuring doughnuts from Thomas, her crush, who is evidently one of the hospital's cooks.

She looks at the hand she's been dealt, before removing two cards and placing them face down with a double tap. I remove two cards from the top of the main deck and hand them to her.

"Well?" I ask, rather impatiently.

Her eyes don't leave her cards as she responds, "JJ's in the PHP."

"PHP?" I shake my head in question,

"Partial Hospitalization Program. He's not a full-time resident anymore. He's what they refer to as 'mainstreaming.'" She says the last word in an exaggerated posh voice.

"Mainstreaming?" _God, it's like you need a special dictionary to get through a conversation in here._

"Yeah, like he's slowly being reintroduced to 'mainstream' society..."

"Oh," I say thoughtfully.

"So, he can't screw this up. He can't make any mistakes or he'll end up back here." She places her hands and cards in her lap before finally looking up at me, "And no one is gonna rat him out and fuck it up for him, yeah?"

"Right. Yeah." I finally look down at my cards then. I've got nothing. As per.

She nods, "Good."

After losing several games of poker to Effy, I stretch my legs out from beneath me and make to get up.

"Where's the loo?"

Effy looks up from picking at her chipped nail polished fingers, "Tell Josie you need to go - she's the younger, kinda dumpy-looking brunette at the nurse's station. She's alright, a bit chipper, but alright. Doesn't even perve on you as you go."

My eyes narrow, "They're meant to go in with you?"

Effy shrugs, "Depends on the program the doctor puts you on." It's when she says things like that with such a nonchalance that I wonder how long _she's_ been in here. I'm tempted to ask, but decide it best not to potentially offend the only somewhat normal person I've met in here.

"But, that's crazy," I argue.

She laughs, looks about the room before giving me a pointed look, "You _do_ know where you are, right?"

"Yeah, yeah.." I roll my eyes and walk away. I see several women behind a half wall separating the the nurse's station and common room. I quickly scan each of the nurses looking for Josie and am relieved to find that Ramona is noticeably missing. I spy a younger nurse who is reading a file whilst humming cheerfully to herself. Must be Josie. "Pardon, I need to use the loo?"

She looks from the file to me and smiles, "Oh hi, you must be Naomi. The loo? Yes, of course." She places the file into a cabinet and walks out of a side door that closes with a mechanical click. She reaches a hand out to me, "I'm Josie, by the way."

I shake it and nod, "Naomi."

We walk down the main corridor and it is only then that I notice all of the portraits hanging along the walls.

"Those are the Delfinos, the original owners of the estate," Josie says as she notices my gait slow down while I look at the passing portraits.

I come to a stop looking at one of the old photographs where several men are dressed in top hats and tails and a couple women are done up with massive, heavy looking dresses posed outside of the hospital.

"Oh, how lovely those dresses are! It makes you just want to dance..." Josie says dreamily.

I look at her, then back at the portrait. "They look like a bunch of tossers to me." I deadpan and continue walking down the hallway.

Josie catches up to me and motions with her hand, "Just down here," and we make a turn off from the main corridor.

"I would have thought the washrooms would have been closer?" I ask.

"Oh. Well, they are. It's just I don't much like the ones by the CR... gives me the heebie-jeebies they do," she shudders. She catches herself then and adds cheerfully, "Besides, these are cleaner!" She stops in front of a closed door and retrieves a key card from her pocket before taping it against the card pad on the wall. The door unlocks with a click and she turns the handle and motions into the room, stepping inside as the door closes behind her.

There are three stalls... all without doors. I look at them with annoyance and select the furthest one from where Josie is currently stood. I attend to my business, flush the toilet, and move promptly to the water basin to wash my hands.

"How are you liking your stay so far Naomi?"

I rub soap into my hands and scrub. "Am I meant to like it?"

She smiles at me through my reflection in the mirror. "Well, you seem to be getting along with Effy... and she certainly doesn't take to people, especially right away."

"She's alright, I guess," I move to dry my hands on the towel, "Has she been here long?"

"Oh, yes, quite a while I suppose. 'Course not nearly as long as Pandora, poor dear, but at least for as long as I've been here. She's a good girl, Effy, doesn't always act it, but she is,"she continues, "She's been really good lately, no fits or anything..." she stops suddenly.

I throw the used towel in the bin and turn around to her, "You were saying?" I urge her to continue, my curiosity finally being satisfied.

"That's just it – I shouldn't have said any of that. So stupid, Josie," she scolds herself.

"No worries Josie, I won't say anything."

She smiles then, "Good, thank you. I need this job and I rather like it too. Well, I reckon we should head back, yeah?"

I nod and follow her out the door. We only take a few steps before Ramona rounds the corner, "Naomi, _there_ you are... you're late! You're meant to meet with the doctor now," she says sternly in a way that is chastising to both Josie and me.

Josie, smiles sheepishly, "I'll take her there now, Miss," she says as she grabs my hand and starts walking me towards the west end of the estate. "Apologies!" she adds as an afterthought.

I am led to a part of the building I haven't yet encountered. Several doors line the corridor and a huge library stands at the end of it. We stop at a door closest to the library and I am led inside. There's a small sitting room serving as a waiting room only without the cheesy pamphlets and boring magazines.

"You can wait for the Doc here," she points to a leather bench, "He should be along soon."

I sit down and look back up at her, "Was there something else Josie?"

"Huh? Oh, no." she says as she makes her way back to the door, "Just, good luck, yeah?"

"Um... thanks?" With that, the strange nurse leaves.

I am sitting in the empty room for several minutes. Out of habit I look to my wrist to check the time, but of course, it was confiscated this morning. I sigh in frustration. As a general rule, I hate waiting, but I _completely detest_ waiting without having fags. I rub my temples, closing my eyes, thinking of the feeling of my lungs expanding with that delicious blend of nicotine and other toxins.

"Pardon? Do you mind, if I...? a petite redhead asks somewhat shyly motioning to the bench.

I shake my head, "Uh, sure," and slide over.

She smiles adding a thank you as she sits. She rifles through a canvas bag with big block letters saying "I like big books and I cannot lie." I can't help but chuckle at that. She looks up at me as she pulls a book out of the bag with a questioning look.

"I like your carryall."

"Oh, thanks!" she says brightly. _Wow, her smile is... yeah._

A door is opened from the adjacent wall and a tall man appears.

"Hello, hello. Naomi, yes?" he says as he approaches me. It takes me all of two seconds to decide that I loathe this man. I loathe his arrogant posture, I loathe his deceptive smile and even his sweater. Actually, I quite like the sweater, but I digress...

"Were you expecting someone else?" I answer with annoyance.

The doctor pauses slightly before he responds, "No, in fact you're _exactly_ who I was expecting."

He then notices the girl sat quietly next to me. "Katie? What are you doing here?" he glances at his watch and then back at the girl.

"You said you wanted to see me before I was allowed visitation today?"

"Ahh, yes, quite right," he says as if remembering a previous conversation. "I wonder if you wouldn't mind terribly, if I see to Naomi first, her being a new patient and all," he asks.

"That's fine, I have a book to entertain me," she replies good-naturedly.

He smiles at both of us, "Sorted. Will you come with me Naomi?"

I suppose there's no use prolonging the inevitable. I reluctantly stand and begin to follow him before we both stop and turn around as the redhead asks a question.

"I—I just want to know, before you go in, that is... I will be allowed visitation today, yeah? I mean, if I'm on restriction, I want to know before you go to session," she finishes somewhat lamely.

The doctor looks at her with consideration, "Naomi, why don't you head on in. Please take a seat wherever you find most comfortable."

I walk into the room, which now I can see is somewhat of an annex off the large library. I look about the room and the many seating choices it offers before settling on a cushy, leather chair adjacent to an identical chair, next to a large desk, that obviously belongs to the doctor. I listen carefully to the conversation occurring outside the still open door.

"Katie, while I appreciate you allowing Naomi to have her session ahead of you – it does show progress – I am disappointed that you've once again turned this into being about you. You are taking time from Naomi. That's unfair. We've spoken about this."

"I'm sorry, really, I am... I just want to know if I'll have visitation today?" she asks hopefully.

There's a pause before the doctor speaks again, "I will allow it, yes. You've attended every Group session this week and I intend to keep my end of our agreement."

I hear a quiet squeal "Thank you!"

"But," he continues, "what I had intended to discuss with you later wasn't regarding today's visitation. Actually, it involves next week's. You see, I've arranged to have a special session next week... one that will coincide with your visitation. We are going to include your Mum, Dad... and Emily."

Another pause followed by a quiet "oh."

"I'd like to hear your thoughts and feelings about that. But right now, I have another patient, and I imagine you'd like to see if you have any visitors waiting in the lounge?"

"Yes, thank you. Sorry again about being a selfish cow."

I hear the exterior door close and look at the interior office door which is now being occupied by the doctor. "Alright, Naomi, I believe proper introductions are in order." He makes his way to me and sits down on the chair adjacent me and smiles with an extended hand, "I'm Dr. Foster."

* * *

**A/N:**

**So there we have it. I'm sure Dr. Foster - everyone's favorite PSYCHO-atrist - in this fic isn't at all surprising, but there is just far too much fun to be had with his character to leave him out.**

**This chapter will be followed by Admitted Part Two, also in Naomi's POV which will include her first session with Foster AND Group Therapy.**

**A monumental thanks must go to _VioletW _who I begged to write this fic for me and was promptly ordered to stop my bitching and start writing. She's mean like that. Speaking of being mean, you all need to read her newest fic _The Strange Case Of Emily Campbell And Katie Fitch_ which is crazy in the best way possible and features Keffy like you've NEVER seen. Seriously.**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	2. Admitted - Naomi, Pt 2

**A/N:**

**I've just returned from a New England vacation and while I had loads of fun, I am happy to be home and happier still to be updating!**

**A big thanks goes to _VioletW_ who totally roleplayed the Foster/Naomi session with me. (Is the word 'roleplay' inherently sexual just to me? Totally not intended!)**

* * *

**Naomi's POV**

"Alright, Naomi, I believe proper introductions are in order." He makes his way to me and sits down on the chair adjacent me and smiles with an extended hand, "I'm Dr. Foster."

"That's nice," I reply in a falsely polite tone ignoring his outstretched hand.

Foster smirks, looks down at his notes, writes something before saying, "I'd like to help you."

"Don't reckon I need your help but cheers mate."

He puts his pen down on his paper, and folds his hands over it. "Naomi. You're here for a reason. The longer you fight me on this, the longer you stay here. I'm flattered if you like my company that much, but I'm willing to bet 100 quid that you don't."

Naomi snorts. "As much as I'd love to spend countless hours with you, I think you'll find I'm only in here for 72 hours. Why don't you put THAT in your notes?'

Foster smiles, "Interesting."

"Pray tell what exactly do you find so _interesting_?" I mock.

"Tell me, why exactly are you here? And for only 72 hours?"

"I'm not _like_ your other... patients. I'm just here for a... break. My Mum and I agreed it would only be for a couple days. So I don't care what you say or what you put in that bloody little notebook – it really doesn't matter much to me. So how's about you let me go back to playing cards and you go ahead and worry about your _real_ patients?" I've had just about enough and stand to leave.

"Naomi. Sit down, we are almost done."

Reluctantly I sit, "What more is there to say, _Doc_?" I say the word as if it tastes badly.

"Well, for starters. I think you're suppressing something. And if we don't figure out what that is, you may find yourself here longer than you think."

I can't help it – I snort. "The only thing I'm _suppressing_ FREUD, is the desire to throttle you with that globe over there." After a thoughtful moment, I add, "and if you think you can keep me here longer than 72 hours, then you've never met Gina Campbell."

"Your Mum loves you, and she will do what _I_ recommend, because _I _am the professional. So why don't you stop hiding behind your anger, and tell me the REAL reason why you are here."

I shake my head with a laugh, "It's just not a goer man."

"Well," he scribbles onto his pad again "then I guess, we'll be seeing a lot of each other. You may leave if you so choose, Naomi," he waves his hand dismissively.

"No worries mate, I won't forget to say goodbye in..." I consult the clock on the wall, "67 hours." I get up and leave with a final one finger salute in his direction.

"Oh, Naomi?"

I stop and turn around with a dramatic sigh and a quirked eyebrow, "Yeah?"

"Best start making friends."

* * *

I stalk away from his office and head back towards the CR. _Dammit, don't call it that! _I pass the gallery corridor and scowl at the portraits as if they can see my outrage and continue until I pass the nurses station. Josie calls from behind the desk, "How'd it go?" I send her a death glare in response. She frowns and looks hurt. If I hadn't been so frustrated I might have even felt a little sorry, but she is part of this god-forsaken hospital too, so fuck her.

I see Effy sat on the floor in front of the couch with a card game in front of her.

"Fucking tosser." I plop myself down on the couch.

Effy looks up from her game of Solitaire, meeting my eyes momentarily, before deciding to collect the cards in a single pile, reaching her arms back to the sofa pulling herself onto it and leaning back casually. "Let's hear it then."

"Nothing much to say except that he's a cunting quack."

She laughs, "Tell me how you really feel."

"I won't see him again – I won't." I shake my head fiercely.

She nods slowly in silence. After a few moments she says, "The thing is, Naomi, it's no secret you're new to all this – it's pretty fucking obviously actually. And it's perfectly fine being the new girl at college, yeah? But here? You need to learn how things work – and quickly. Foster? He runs _everything_. Don't piss him off. Don't question his authority. And don't give him that death glare you've been throwing about." She looks around her briefly before continuing. "He can be... well, no matter – just don't give him a reason to throw about his weight, okay?"

I think about what she's said. He does seem the arrogant (re: small penis) type to use his power just to show he can. Have I pushed him I wonder? I suppose it doesn't matter anyhow. He can hardly do much harm in just a couple days. "I won't bow down to him, I won't be here much longer anyways."

"That's just it, Naomi – _he_ can make you stay longer," she adds with a hint of sadness, "trust me."

"My Mum would never allow it, she's not just gonna dump me here and leave me to rot!" The words are out of my mouth before I realize their implications. I grimace at my words. "God, I'm a twat Effy, I didn't mean it li-"

She raises her hand to stop me. "S'alright." she says, seemingly ending that particular conversation. She begins shuffling the cards, "Any other excitement to report?"

"None to speak of." I say automatically before adding, "Although, I think I saw another patient? Young, redhead?"

"Oh. Yeah, that's Katie."

"Why isn't she in here?" I ask looking about the Common Room.

Effy laughs, "You will find out very soon. See, she doesn't like to hang out with us plebes... might catch crazy and all."

I shrug, "She seemed alright to me..."

"Did she?" Effy eyes me curiously then. "She is rather pretty, don't you think?"

I shrug again in response. She continues looking at me with her penetrating and probing eyes. "What?" I ask.

"Nothing, just didn't know you were into girls is all."

I sigh, "And if I am?"

She laughs then, "Oh, I don't care what you're into. Makes no difference to me. Besides I've taken a swim in the lady pond once or twice."

I smile at her, "And somehow that doesn't surprise me in the least."

She raises a single eyebrow in question.

"You just seem like the type of girl that will try anything once is all," I explain.

"...twice if I like it..." she smirks. We both fall back in giggles.

Josie interrupts then, "Laughter? That's lovely, isn't it? It is after all the best medicine!" The insecure nurse looks at me rather nervously. I smile at her, it's the best I can manage at the moment. She visibly relaxes after that and continues, "Are you both ready for Group? You should start heading down now, wouldn't want to be late."

Effy stands up and reaches her hand to me pulling me up with her. "Come on Cranky-Pants, you aren't gonna want to miss this."

I roll my eyes at her, "I suppose I haven't anything better to do." I allow Effy to lead me towards a door off of the Common Room and through a short hallway, passing Josie's heeby-jeeby inducing bathroom. I'll have to ask Effy about that, I think. Effy points to a room with a large viewing window, "That's the art studio," she says. I look through the window and am impressed by the large built in shelves brimming with supplies. "Freddie's just about always in there. But he's on privileges, so he can be," Effy says as she beckons me onward, "Come on, the likes of us won't be seeing any privileges if we're late to Group."

She stops at a door at the end of the corridor, "Ready to meet the rest of our demented crew?"

* * *

My introduction to the "crew" is a bit anticlimactic. Several cushioned chairs are positioned in a circle where Pandora and JJ are currently sat upon. An attractive Mediterranean-looking boy is sat cross-legged on a chair next to JJ sketching in an open notebook.

"Alright, Freds?" Effy calls to the distracted boy, who looks up from his endeavor and smiles at Effy, "Can't complain, you?"

Effy nods in response, "This is the new girl."

"I do have a name you know?"

"Oh, I know, " Effy smirks, "I just can't call you any of them in front of Panda, she's a bit sensitive to foul language you see."

"Ha-fucking-ha." I turn my face away from Effy and to Freddie, "I'm Naomi."

"Naomi? Hey." He looks at me intently before saying, "You have got amazing eyes, you know that? The color... well, they're, I don't know... deep? No, that's not it... they're, ugh, I can't think of it. But maybe you'll let me sketch them? I'd love to see if I could replicate the color."

"God, Freddie, she doesn't know you yet... you can't talk about her eyeballs like that." Effy scolds, before turning to me, "He's not actually a creeper, honest."

I open my mouth to respond but am interrupted by a booming voice, "Who's ready to get this party started?!" A guy strolls into the center of the ring of chairs, holds his arms out wide before yelling, "Come on guys, let's get fucking mental!"

The room is silent. "Come on guys, _mental_. MENTAL! Get it?"

Effy responds, "We got it Cook. We got it the first time you said it, we got it the second and fortieth time you said it. Get a new line already, yeah?"

Not yet discouraged, he turns to Pandora, "Panda-pops? Still funny, yeah babes?"

Pandora shrugs, "It _is_ a bit old Cookie..."

He looks around to Freddie for support but stops as he notices me. "Whoa-ho-ho... Christmas comes early this year and someone was a very good boy! Hey there, Blondie!"

"It's Naomi, wanker," I clarify.

"Alright, alright, I get it. You're feisty – I like it, Blondie," he rakes his eyes from my head to my toes and then back again, "I like it," he adds in confirmation.

I cross my arms over my chest and prepare to detonize my death glare when Effy, places a hand on my arm, "Saying anything back to him right now, is just encouragement... and by encouragement I mean wanking material."

"Aw, come on Eff, I thought you liked my _wanking material_," he winks as he thrusts his pelvis several times.

"Give it a rest mate, yeah?" Freddie says.

"What's it to you, _mate_?"

Freddie gets up, puts his arm around Cook's shoulders. "Nothing... just chill man, yeah?" Freddie leads him to a chair before sitting upon it and patting the seat next to him, "Come on." Cook relents and sits down but not before wrapping his arms around Freddie and giving him a noogie, ruffling his hair with a laugh.

Effy sits down next to a smiling Pandora leaving two remaining seats directly across from from the two girls. I look at the two chairs, one next to JJ and one next to Cook, and finally decided on JJ - the lesser of two nutters.

"This is cozy, ain't it?" Pandora asks the group. "It's been so long since we had such a whizzer group!"

No one responds, but she doesn't seem like she expects anyone to. She turns to Effy who smiles and pats Pandora's lap.

A tall and slender woman enters the room carrying the ever present and seemingly obligatory notebook. "Everyone here?" She asks as she looks around the room, nodding as if she's ticking names off a mental list. She stops once she reaches me, "Naomi, great. I'm Harriet." She looks at the empty seat next to me with a frown. "Katie? Where's Katie?" She looks at the faces of the teens who either shrug in response or outright ignore her question. "Has anyone seen Katie?" She sighs, and says under her breath something that sounds suspiciously like 'needs to be tagged.'

She drags a chair from along the front wall and sets it down amongst the other chairs. "I'm sorry not all of your group thought it was important to be here, it really shows a lack of respect for all of you and the group as a whole." She balls her hands together to emphasize the word whole. I stifle a laugh and look across at Effy, requiring me to swallow back full on laughter as I am met with her repeating the gesture with exaggerated clasped hands.

Harriet looks between me and Effy with a warning gaze and continues. "_However_, we must move on. Where to start?" She looks about the room as she sits elegantly in the chair on the upper most part of the circle. "JJ? Would you like to begin?"

JJ looks down into his lap. "I don't really have anything to contribute today."

"Surely that's not true. Tell us how things have been going with the PHP?"

"Good. Quite good," he states quickly.

"Can you elaborate on that Jeremiah?"

"Oh God, I was _so_ hoping I would have missed this abortion," Katie strolls into the room with an air of annoyance and distaste. She sits in the empty seat next to me, but doesn't notice me as she is too preoccupied using her nails to push back her cuticles.

"Is there any reason in particular that you are late to Group?" Harriet asks with thinly-veiled annoyance.

Katie responds with a lazy shrug, never looking up from her nails.

"Are we," she motions to the circle, "interrupting something that you would rather be doing?"

At this Katie looks up, "Listen babes, I'd rather have a _colonic_ than be here. But I'm here, aren't I? Jesus, you should be grateful... honestly!" She shakes her head in a chastising way before attending to her nails again.

"Enough! I have had about enough of you. You are rude and disrespectful. Tell me, do you honestly think you are better than anyone here?"

"Uh, look around Harriet, I _know_ I'm better." She stands up and walks to JJ pointing, "Exhibit A, JJ; an anxious ridden fool who can't spit out a single fucking sentence without rambling on like an idiot. And I won't even start on the OCD. Tell me Gay-Jay, when you wank are you unable to stop until you've gone five times too?

She walks over to Freddie, "And then we have Freddie... easy on the eyes, I admit, but you still fall asleep every night hoping you don't wake up, don't ya babes? Every morning a disappointment, yeah?" She walks away while 'tsk-ing'.

Freddie shakes his head, "Fuck you Katie."

"Sorry, hun – I never make the same mistake twice." She then side-steps and stands in front of Cook. "Speaking of _mistakes_... Cookie. Answer me this babes, exactly how many times has your Mum visited you?"

Cook stands up and points down at Katie, "You dunno what you're taking about little girl. So you better watch your mouth."

His reaction elates her and she laughs and moves on to stand in front of Pandora.

"Hi, Katie," Panda greets cautiously.

Katie brushes some blonde hair from her face, "Oh, our sweet Panda. You _are_ sweet, aren't you, love?" She asks the girl who nods in response, "Yes, you are. You are just about the sweetest little nutter I've ever met. How long has it been now? Must be about six, no _seven_ years now. God, what _did_ you do to end up in here?"

"Stop." Everyone looks at Effy who uttering just a single word, has made Katie pause in her abuse.

Effy uses this break to put her arm around Pandora while the blonde quietly sobs into her shoulder.

However, Katie's cease-fire is short lived. "Oh, don't worry Effy, I haven't forgotten about you." She crouches down and begins to rub Effy's hand in mock-comfort. "If it's possible, I think you may actually be crazier than Panda... I mean, what with your delusional fits... your voices..." Katie gets up then and begins looking around the room worriedly, "Tell me, are the monsters here now?" Katie must find herself quite clever and laughs joyously.

I've had quite enough of this. "I suppose that just leaves me then."

Katie turns around and looks at me as if noticing me for the first time.

I continue, "Come on now, surely you've diagnosed me also... seeing as you're the expert and all, _Doctor_ Katie, is it?"

She looks me up and down before a smile reaches her face, "As a matter of fact, I have, New Girl. It's really quite obvious that you and Freddie are kindred spirits, seeing as you're both suicidal."

"That so? How do you figure?" I challenge.

"Surely, anyone that can wear a shirt like that has well and truly given up on life."

I laugh, "That's good, Katiekins, real good." I stand up and look down at the petite girl, "But seeing as I'm new here, surely you can help me out a bit, yeah?"

"I think you're a bit beyond help, babes," she says patting my shoulder and walking past me to sit down, as if her reign of terror physically exhausted her.

"That's a shame. See, I'd really love to know why _you're_ here. Seeing as you're so much better than us lot, surely you wouldn't mind sharing your story."

Katie scoffs but remains otherwise silent.

"Well, go on then," I say in mock encouragement, "Nothing to say now, Katie?"

Katie opens her mouth to respond but is stopped, by a raised hand from Harriet. "I think this is a good place to stop for today. Thank you all for coming, you may go." Harriet motions towards the door and everyone moves to leave. "Naomi, may I have a word?" I turn from Harriet to Effy who tells me she'll catch up with me in the CR, "Yeah, alright." I walk back towards the woman and look at her expectantly.

"I only wanted to say that I think you made some good contributions today. And I think you're going to be a real asset to us. We need a voice like yours in Group."

"You mean, like the type of voice that was meant to stop that bitch from systematically attacking your group? _You_ should have stopped her _Harriet_."

She sighs, "I can see why you would think that way. And perhaps, I _could_ have stepped in sooner, but you have to realize, today we made some progress, _real_ progress. I know that may not make sense to you right now, but I hope you'll allow me the chance to show you that I _do_ have your best interests in mind. Even Katie's. I'm sorry you feel otherwise." She heads towards the door before turning around. "I've spoken with Dr. Foster. He says you're a very bright girl, and I'm inclined to believe him. You know, I think we can really help you, and I think you might surprise yourself and find that you may help others too. It may be an odd thing to say, and consequently, an odd thing to hear, but I'm happy you'll be staying with us for several weeks."

"I'm sorry, you're mistaken. I'm meant to be here for 72 hours," my voice goes up at the end of the sentence making it sound suspiciously like a question, even though it's a simple statement. A statement of fact. I _am_ staying here for 72 hours.

"Oh, heaven's no, dear. We've already sorted everything with your Mum, your meant to stay until Dr. Foster believes you're ready to return home. Now don't worry, we'll take good care of you." She smiles and walks out the door leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I collapse into the nearest chair and cry. It's one of those cries that is filled with silent but body convulsing sobs. I don't know how long I'm sat there draining my body of all of it's natural stores of hydration, but it feels like forever. And suddenly, I find myself completely exhausted, from the lifeless blonde locks upon my head, to the tips of my toes. I wipe my face with my hands and gather every ounce of energy I have left and begin walking. I don't stop once I reach the Common Room. I pass the nurse's station, the hall of ghosts past and finally come upon the entrance to my room. I collapse into my bed, not bothering to change or even turn off the light. My last thought as sleep finally overtakes me is, 'I need a fucking fag.'

* * *

**A/N:**

**Thanks so much for the reviews, faves and follows!**

**_FClydEN_ - Stay tuned... more will be revealed!**

**_VioletW_ - Yeah, yeah. Ditto babes! Thanks a bunch for all your help... and pestering. Annnnd thanks for putting up with all my whining. I honestly don't know how you do it. Love ya to bits!**

**_Artemis_ _athena90_ - Thanks! Will do! :)**

**_mynameislizzie_ - I hope you still think it's convincing when more is revealed about everyone's conditions. It's a bit daunting actually... everyone has a story and I'm finding it tricky to figure out how to do it all. So thanks so much for your super nice words!**

**_Tiffythetitan_ - Yes, it really does! I saw them at a book festival and fell in love. Interesting theory... I promise I won't make you wait too long to find out. From what I've mapped out, Katie's Admitted chapter should be Chapter 4.**

**_garden_-_nomes_ - Thank you, I plan to!**

**Until next time!**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	3. Indefinite

**A/N**

**Back again with Chapter 3! For those wondering, I'm hoping to get out a chapter at least once a week- fingers crossed!**

**So I wrote this entire chapter while listening to Haim's album Days Are Gone. It's different, but seriously good. Although when I made my (gay) sister listen to it, she said, I kid you not, "but this is SO GAY!" Really?**

* * *

**Naomi's POV**

I roll over and open my eyes to find myself in my room. Some merciful soul must have turned off my lights as the only brightness is coming from the window. I groan at the pain behind my eyes. I hate crying. I've never made a habit of it so I'm always surprised by the painful throbbing reminding me of my weakness. I haven't felt this weak, this small since that night. The night that everything fell apart, the night that broke me. Or tried to anyway. But I won't let it. I move my legs into my chest, wrapping my arms into them. I can't think of that. Can't let myself go there. But it is there and I feel it like a monster hiding under my bed waiting for the perfect moment to arise and take me wholly and completely. And I won't let that happen. My hands move up to cradle my head, placing pressure on my temples. I close my eyes, take a deep breath, counting to three and I exhale.

When I open my eyes, they are met with stockings and orthopedic shoes. I allow my gaze to drift upwards and look upon the face of an elderly nurse.

"Just here for checks, dear."

I pull my body up so that I'm in a sitting position. "What are checks?"

"Oh, you _are_ a first-timer, aren't you?" she asks with amusement, not waiting for a reply she answers, "When you're admitted and have met with Dr. Foster he creates a program specific to you. Including how often you're checked on."

"I don't follow."

"Well dear, it's quite simple really. You, are on one hour watches. Someone will always be checking in on you every hour."

I snort.

"Is that amusing?"

"I just don't see the point really. I'm not suicidal." I hold up my wrists as evidence of this. "See?"

She shakes her head at me and I find myself feeling a bit insecure. Am I missing something?

"Just following orders. You can always take it up with Dr. Foster," she says.

I am about to make a scathing remark about the good doctor when I am interrupted by high pitched screaming. I hear the nurse say something like 'not again' before running off into the hallway. Curiosity gets the best of me and I make my way to the door.

There are several nurses and other hospital staff surrounding a screaming patient. I see Ramona running to the crowd with a syringe. It is long before the shouting dies out. The nurses begin to disperse, the commotion apparently over. I see a body slumped on the ground before a male nurse picks them up. "Where do you want her?" he asks looking at Ramona.

Ramona sighs before answering, "Take her to QR Two." He nods and carries the girl off. As he passes by me I see blonde pigtails. Pandora. I continue watching the slumped girl recede into the distance until I can no longer see them. I turn and look back to the place where Pandora had been screaming looking for possible reasons for the meltdown. But then I realize there needn't _be_ a reason. She's in a mental hospital after all. She's crazy – that's reason enough. I internally grimace when I realize what that implies for me. I look up from the floor and notice that Effy is stood against the wall glaring at Ramona with eyes filled with... anger? I walk to her.

"This is bullshit." She says in greeting.

"What happened? She seemed alright."

She looks at me and instead of answering marches off to Ramona. I follow Effy not knowing what else to do.

"Why would you do that to her?" Effy asks, demanding an answer.

Ramona who had been talking to another nurse excitedly about her weekend plans turns around and upon seeing Effy tells the nurse she will speak to her later.

"Elizabeth, you know quite well I can't discuss other residents with you."

"_You_ know quite well she's terrified of the QR."

"What would you have me do? Allow her to continue like that waking up all of the residents?"

"You could have given her a fucking chance. She would have calmed down and you know it."

Ramona glares at the brunette, "I know no such thing Miss Stonem – and neither do you. She was out of control with a _fit_. If you'd like to discuss this further I can call Dr. Foster and we can... _sort_ things out."

Effy swallows hard, clenching her jaw, "No need."

Ramona smirks victoriously at Effy and turns to me with a nod, "Now if you'll excuse me, young ladies," and flies away on her broom. Okay, I made that bit up, but you know what I mean.

* * *

Effy stalks off and I'm unsure what to do, so I stand there. She must realize I'm not walking with her and she turns around, "Are you coming then?"

I begin walking towards her. "Where exactly are we going?"

"To have a little chat with your new best friend." She answers with a pointed look.

I look at her in question before realizing she can only mean one person. "You're having a fucking laugh."

She smirks as she grabs my hand and pulls me along the corridor. "Come on Campbell, we've got things to do!"

I stop in my tracks which causes her to be pulled backwards as she is still holding my hand.

"I don't recall telling you my last name."

"That's 'cause you didn't."

"Then, how di-"

"Come _on_, Anger Management, we don't have time for this." She interrupts.

I cross my arms over my chest and roll my eyes. "How clever, I've _never_ heard that before, _Elizabeth_."

She mimics my stance and sighs. "Alright, alright, I may have sneaked a glance in your file."

"Impressive."

She smiles. "Yes, well, I'll tell you everything I know if you shut your trap and come with me, yeah?"

"Lead the way."

* * *

As it turns out we were not going far as Katie's room was only a few doors down from Effy's. We enter the still dark room and see the redhead sound asleep in her bed. I look at Effy who smiles at finding her still asleep. She motions for me to turn on the light. The moment I flick the switch to the on position, Effy whispers something into Katie's ear. I can't hear what she's said, but by the way that Katie wakes with a start I know it can't have been good.

"What the actual fuck?!" Katie shouts as she shoves Effy away from her.

"Well that's hardly a way to greet your guests, Katiekins," Effy replies.

Katie scowls at Effy before she notices me standing by the door. "Ugh, it's like a fucking loser convention."

"It's well fitting then, us being in _your_ room," I retort.

"Yeah, and you can fuck off now. Don't you have like a lobotomy to get to or something?" she says turning back to Effy.

"Not today, babes... today I'm _all_ yours..." Effy says as she sits on her bed, looks to me and pats the space next to her.

I take the hint and sit down, "Yes, we both are," I add.

Katie looks at us with unconcealed disgust. "What the fuck? Just leave me alone you lezzer bitches."

"I'm afraid we can't do that Katiekins," Effy continues, "You see, I'm afraid you're stuck with us until you help us with a little problem. And seeing as how _you're_ the cause, I'm sure you won't object."

Katie scoffs, "I'm not helping you with shit."

"I think you'll find that you are, unless of course you're prepared to spend the next several days with two loser-ish shadows following you about."

She considers this for a moment. "What problem have I allegedly caused?"

"It's Pandora. She's in the QR."

At this, a flash of something resembling guilt crosses Katie's face momentarily before she remembers herself. "Yeah, well she's a looney bint."

Effy opens her mouth to respond but I silence her with a look. "You know what Effy? I don't think we really need Katie's help. I'm sure we can manage on our own. But before we do, we need to stop by and have a little chat with Dr. Foster. You see, it seems that Katie and Foster have an agreement regarding her visitation privileges and as it turns out, Katie has violated those terms. Naturally, I think it's only fair that we let him know, don't you think Eff?"

Effy looks at me with a bright smile before parroting my earlier words, "Lead the way."

Katie on the other hand looks at me with first confusion and then a white hot anger. "How do you know anything about that?"

"Well, we best be off. Have a nice one, Katiekins!" I say brightly as we move to leave. But before we've reached the doorway, Katie blocks us.

"What do I need to do?"

Effy and I look at each other proudly.

* * *

I have to admit I'm relieved my bluff worked. I've no idea what the terms of Katie and Dr. Foster's agreement are, but thankfully she doesn't know that. I still can't believe the girl I initially met yesterday and the bitch I know now is the same person. But I suppose Katie pretends to be one person for Foster's benefit and an entirely different person for everyone else. Lucky us.

I don't know how Effy plans on helping Pandora get out of QR (whatever that is) but she seems relieved to be doing _something_. For Katie's part she's agreeing to everything Effy is proposing. Granted, whether it's from a place of guilt or of self-preservation, I don't know, but for now, we'll take it. I'm taken from my thoughts, by a pair of blue and brown eyes looking at me in question.

"Pardon?"

"You think you could consult the demons in your mind on your own time? Some of us have shit to do?" Katie asks.

Effy smiles, "I _said_, do you understand? But you weren't listening at all, were you?"

"I kinda tuned out at 'so this is what we're gonna do'..." I answer honestly.

Katie looks at me incredulously, "Jesus, you're not even a _real_ blonde – stop acting the part, yeah?"

Effy laughs and explains the "plan" again. I use the term loosely because really, as far as cunning plans are concerned, this one is rather weak. But in Effy's defense there's really not a whole lot we _can_ do in here, and so this idea is as good as it's gonna get.

* * *

The plan begins with taking showers, which I can't really complain about. My complaint comes from the fact that they are supervised. Yes, showers are supervised. Effy warns me of this when the plan was initially proposed but my brain is still having problems processing this information. Actually, the fact that they are supervised is a vital part to our plan. Another important piece, is relying on Katie's dramatic and bitchy nature to draw attention away from me and Effy. Somehow, I have full faith in Katie's ability to do just that perfectly.

Effy and I make arrangements with Josie to bathe. I am back in my bedroom gathering the clean clothes that I will be changing into when Effy walks in.

"Ready?" she asks.

"Just about, yeah," I say as I sling the clothes over my shoulder.

Josie meets us in the main corridor with a cheerful smile and greeting, "Morning, girls!"

"Hi Josie," we say in unison.

After a short walk we are led to a secured wing of the hospital requiring staff to use their key cards to gain entrance. Not only does this wing hold the communal showers, it also contains the corridor holding the half dozen or so QR's. While Josie unlocks the door to the actual showers, Effy points to a dark hallway indicating where Pandora is being held. I look down at the ominous corridor and my concern for Pandora grows.

Josie motions us into the room and immediately unlocks a cabinet and takes out two small bottles of shampoo, conditioner, some soap and towels, handing them to us. "I'm afraid, Dr. Foster hasn't approved razors for either of you," Josie explains slightly embarrassed.

Now, _that_ is not surprising in the least. For once I'm glad that I wax and should be sorted for a few weeks... not that I will be here that long. I take the items and turn to look at the short rows of showers divided by barriers, not unlike a gym. I sigh before selecting the shower closest to the door and place the toiletries on a shelf in my cubicle and hang the towel on a hook. I chance a look at Effy who is doing the same in the stall next to mine. She meets my eyes and nods encouragingly and turns towards Josie and asks her what book she's brought today.

"Oh, it's the latest Dan Brown, very thrilling."

"Sweet," Effy responds, before adding, "could you read it aloud to us?"

"Yes, of course I can!"

So far, so good. I turn the taps on and wait for the water to get warm before taking off my clothes and hanging them also on the hook. Once it's reasonably warm, I step under, leaning my head back allowing the water to pour down my face and hair. I quickly attend to my needs and periodically look over to Josie making sure her nose is still in the book. Once I'm sure she is properly absorbed into the story, I step away from underneath the cascading water and wrap myself in my towel and ring out my hair – leaving the taps running. I look over to Effy who is now doing the same. We quickly get dressed and then wait anxiously for Katie. We haven't long to wait before there's loud banging on the door.

Josie looks up from reading, places the book on her chair and answers the door.

"What the actual fuck, Josie? You were meant to get me!" Katie shouts as she barrels into the bathroom.

Ingrid, another nurse I've met once before looks at Josie apologetically. "It seems Miss Fitch was on the schedule for showers as well." She looks at Josie apologetically before walking away.

"Oh? I – I... I'm sorry, I must have forgotten," Josie apologizes.

"That's well convenient. We both know exactly why you "forgot" to get me. You just don't want to wait around whilst I take a _proper_ shower. You've been spoilt by the likes of those two who have no sense of good hygiene. Well, don't think for a second that _I_ will indulge your impatience."

"No, no, that's fine Katie... take as long as you like," Josie says meekly as she hands the redhead a towel and toiletries.

I hear Katie select the furthest stall directly across from Josie and turn on the taps, closing the flimsy and nearly see through curtain.

"Shit," Katie huffs followed by her opening the curtain and directing her attention to Josie. "You've made me forget my shower shoes!" She doesn't allow Josie to speak before she continues berating the nurse. "Well _you_ are going to fix that, aren't you? Be a dear and fetch them."

"Oh, no, Katie I can't leave you lot on your own. I'll just call down to the nurse's station and have someone bring them here."

"That won't do Josie. Ingrid's just left on her break and that just leaves Old Hag Mags... and it'll take her _ages_ to get them. This is your fault after all."

Josie looks around worriedly looking at all of our occupied cubicles and back to Katie. "But I'm not allowed," Josie whines.

"Yes, well, you're not allowed to do a lot, are you? And yet, you do. So go on then, run along," she says dismissively.

Effy takes the opportunity to pop her head from the curtain. Not revealing her already clothed body. "Might as well do it, Josie. You _know_ how she's like. Besides, I'll make sure everyone behaves."

Josie stands up and nods her head, "Alright then, I'll be quick as a whip," and walks hurriedly out the door.

Effy runs out of her cubicle to catch the door before it closes and places a plastic shampoo bottle between the wooden door and the jam. "Come on, Campbell, we have two minutes – three at best."

I follow closely behind Effy and we both turn back to Katie who sighs and looks at us with impatience, "Are you just going to stand there and try to perve through the curtain or attend to Pandora?"

Effy smirks before peering through the crack in the door. "Clear," she says and nods to me.

We make our way out and as quietly and stealthily as possibly move to the QR corridor. As we approach the second door in the darkened hallway I hear small, pathetic sounding whimpers.

Effy closes her eyes and slides down the door. "I'm here Panda, I'm here."

I hear shuffling from within the room. "Eff? Oh, Effy... it's horrible, I..."

"Shhh, shhh, I know, Panda-pops, I know. But you're alright, yeah? It'll be over soon, you'll be _out_ soon. I promise. You just need to hang in there... keep calm. No more screaming, okay?"

Pandora whimpers in response.

"No, Panda – promise me. No more screaming. Don't let them shoot you up with more sedatives."

After a long pause, Pandora answers quietly, "Alright Eff, I promise."

"Good girl. I have a surprise for you. You're newest friend is here," Effy says and beckons me to sit down with her.

"Hey Panda," I say tentatively, unsure of what to say.

"Naomi... you came!"

"Course I did – we're mates, aren't we?" I ask at which Effy smiles brilliantly at me.

"Yeah we are," Pandora confirms sounding far better than when we first arrived.

Encouraged by Effy's all too rare smile, I continue, "Thing is mate, we were supposed to play Monopoly yesterday, so I figure you owe me a game. You reckon you can sort out this QR nonsense so we can do that?"

"Yeah, I can do that Noams," she responds causing Effy to quirk her eyebrows at the new nickname.

"Sorted then," I say.

Effy stands up then, placing her hand against the door. "Panda, we have to go now. You'll remember what I said, yeah? Everything will be okay, I promise. Nothing can hurt you in there, yeah?"

"I'll remember Eff," Panda promises, "I love you."

Effy looks down with a slight smile, "Love you too," she says quietly patting the door softly with her hand.

I turn my head quickly as I hear sounds coming from my right. It is then that I see Josie walking briskly through the corridor and opening the bathroom door. I look worriedly at Effy. She turns back to the door and whispers in farewell, "Hang in there Panda."

We walk towards the bathroom door before I turn to her, "So, what do we do now?"

She places her ear against the door and hears Josie and Katie's voices coming from within inside. She stands up, "Wing it?" she says with a shrug.

"_That's_ your brilliant plan?" I ask with undisguised doubt, "Why the fuck do I listen to you?" I ask.

"That's a great question, Naoms," she replies with a smirk.

I roll my eyes, "Alright, let's do this."

* * *

Okay, that shouldn't have worked, but it did. Katie, Effy and I are sat eating lunch in the dining hall. I am picking at my egg salad sandwich and look over at Katie who has just announced that we owe her big time.

"Why's that Katiekins, cause you tried to right a wrong that _you_ caused?"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, Blondie," she says as she rips the crust off her bread.

Effy glares at Katie, who sensing it, looks up from her sandwich, "What?"

"Don't mess with her again Katie – I mean it. She's off limits. You want to go on insulting all of us and throwing shit about, fine. But you let her be, understand?"

"Ugh, don't get your knickers twisted, babes. I was just kidding. God, why does _everyone_ take everything so _personally_?"

"Um, maybe because you attacked everyone, you know, _personally_?" I ask.

"Whatever," she says as she gets up, leaving her tray of food on the table before adding, "Bye, losers!" I watch her walk away with a scowl and turn to face Effy who has been watching me.

"What was it you said yesterday about her being 'alright'?"

"Yeah, well apparently I'm delusional now," I match her gaze, "You must be rubbing off on me or something."

"Nice one," she smiles. She looks at me thoughtfully for a minute and then gets up and returns to our table with two steaming cups of tea.

"So," she says as she pours milk into our mugs, "missed you after Group last night..."

I don't respond. I watch as the milk swirls and is absorbed by the dark tea until it settles into a creamy brown. I look up at her and glare, daring her to continue.

She chuckles, "You can stop with the glaring – that shit doesn't work on me, Campbell."

I take one of the mugs and take a sip and enjoy the burning as the hot liquid all but scalds my throat. I continue to look at the tea.

Effy places a hand on my thigh. While she does it gently, it still startles me a bit. Like I said, I don't like being touched. My Mum, unlike me, is affectionate to an extreme. I can't pass her in the hallway without being pulled into a hug or rubbed on the back. It's weird. I always hated that. But now, I'd give just about anything for her to play with my hair while we watch telly. I look at Effy's hand on my leg and a tear escapes and splashed onto her, betraying me.

She moves her hand from my leg to my hand, not even bothering to wipe the tear off, and pulls me away from the table. I allow her to drag me along. I feel powerless to do anything anyways, and for just a moment I enjoy having someone else take charge. She takes me to the Common Room and stops at the nurse's station.

"Mags, we're going to do a bit of yoga. Can we use the Group Room?"

"That's lovely, yes of course. I think you'll find the mats along the wall in there anyway."

Effy nods and continues to drag me along the corridor and into the Group Room. She releases my hand and retrieves two rubbery mats from the rear of the room and places them in the center of the circled chairs.

"Sit," she orders pointing to one of the mats. She sits upon the other one facing me. "Talk."

"Nothing much to say really."

"Bollocks," she responds quickly before adding, "Talk."

"Jesus, Effy, I just _told_ you, I don't have anything to say!" I shout at her.

She smiles then, damn her. "What the fuck, Effy? Leave me alone!" I continue shouting as I begin to get up. I don't get far as she reaches her hands up, pulling me down onto the mat again. Sitting on her haunches, she leans over and hugs me. When I try to shake from her embrace she just holds on tighter.

"Let go, Naomi," she says quietly.

"I can't," I respond softly, shaking my head.

"You can," she says and rubs my back within our embrace.

In that moment, for reasons I don't know, I do. I let go, for however brief it lasts I surrender into her comfort.

* * *

When I've removed myself from Effy's embrace I look down in embarrassment and pick along the edges of the rubbery mat.

"Harriet says I'm to be here until Foster says I can leave," I finally say as I wipe the last fallen tear from my cheek.

She nods sadly, "I thought that might be the case."

"What am I going to do?" I ask her with something that feels close to desperation.

She sighs, "Well, I suppose you have a couple options. One, you can fake it. Go to your individuals, contribute to group, make it like you've accepted the program. Two, you can continue to fight against it and hope that things get better. Or..." she pauses.

"Or what?" I ask.

"Or, you can, you know, _try_."

I scoff at that. "_That's_ not gonna happen. This is all a mistake... I shouldn't even be here!"

"Is that right? So then, tell me, why _are_ you here?" she asks frustrated, "You know, you and Katie have more in common than you know. You both think you're better than everyone, that you don't belong here with us nutters."

I cringe at her words, "That's not true Eff, I don't think I'm any better than you. And I don't think you're a nutter, honest."

"Well I am. A nutter that is. Katie was right, I do hear voices... I even see things sometimes."

I don't know what to say to that. When Katie had revealed that information about Effy I thought perhaps it was an exaggeration.

"It's alright, I know it's weird and crazy and..."

"No, it's not that Effy," I pause before continuing, "It's just, if you really do hear voices or see shit, then I'm kinda impressed. I mean you act fucking normal enough to me."

She laughs, "I'm not sure I've ever heard myself and normal in the same sentence together."

I laugh. "Listen Effy, I'm sorry, _really_. I don't think I'm better than anyone."

"But you still don't think you belong here," Effy explains, "and yet here you are. There must be a reason. People don't just find themselves in a place like this without provocation."

"I suppose not," I shrug. "My Mum, she just worries is all. Something happened last summer and it's not even a big deal, but she thought I should talk about it with someone. She _begged_ actually. So for no other reason than to shut her up, I went to see this doctor. He was actually alright. See, I was having trouble sleeping and concentrating. Just stressed I guess, with revising and all. So he listened. Listened to me drone on and on about Uni possibilities and coursework and just general shit really. But after a while it was harder and harder to sleep. My brain just wouldn't shut down. I found myself drinking loads of caffeine just to stay upright enough to go to classes. But I couldn't focus, couldn't concentrate and think enough to do my work properly. I went out one day to do the shopping and I accidentally walked into traffic. It wasn't intentional. My brain just wasn't _working_. I couldn't process the cars going by and I nearly got hit. The police were called and I was escorted home where they told my Mum what they _thought_ I had tried to do. We talked about it for hours, I begged her to believe me – I wasn't trying to harm myself. She finally agreed that she believed me but called Dr. Ambrose and explained what happened. We made an appointment the following day. That's when he told me about Delfino House and how he thought I could use a break. He didn't say it would be like this. He told me I could relax, refocus. But this isn't right."

Effy studies me closely for a minute before responding, "So? Do what Dr. Ambrose suggested. Use this as a break."

"This isn't exactly relaxing Effy! Look around – look at what they are doing to Panda!" I shout once again. After a moment I look at her regretfully, "Sorry, I don't mean to take it out on you."

She shrugs, clearly unaffected by my outburst.

"By the way, what does QR stand for anyways?"

She laughs before answering, "Quiet Room."

I join in her laughter before replying, "Bit of a misnomer that is."

"Definitely," Effy says. "So, what are you going to do then?"

I sigh, "I haven't a clue mate."

"I can think of a thing or two you can do Blondie," Cook chuckles as he comes into the room sitting next to us with wagging eyebrows.

I look at him with genuine interest, "Does that ever work?"

"What?" he asks.

"Your lines? Do they ever work?"

He grins, pulling Effy into his side. "Worked with here Effy, didn't it?"

I look at Effy for confirmation. She nods raising her eyebrow as if waiting for my judgment.

"So are you two like... _together_?"

They both look at each other before laughing hysterically at the apparently ludicrous question. "What? What's so funny?"

Cook, still clutching his stomach from laughter pains explains further. "Listen Blondie, Delfino House takes a lot from you, you get me? Your freedom, your time, even your fucking thoughts. Not to mention this shit hole is boring as fuck. Which leads us to fucking. Not only is it massively entertaining and _fulfilling_," he continues with another wag of his eyebrows, "it also serves as a massive fuck you to Foster, yeah? He'd about shit his pants if he knew all the shagging that went on."

"Plus, you just get horny as fuck." Effy explains plainly.

"That's right. So, anytime you fancy a ride on the Cookie Monster, you let me know. I think you'll find I have everything you need to satisfy. Ask Effy, she'll tell ya."

Effy shrugs, "He's actually an alright shag, considering..."

"Oi! Considering what?"

"Considering what a wanker you are, Cook."

"Can't fight who you are lover," he responds with a kiss on Effy's cheek. He looks at me then, "So what do you say Blondie?"

"I'd say you'd have better chances shagging Ramona."

He laughs heartily, "Nice one, Blondie. Listen love, I won't take your snarky comments to heart. 'Cause they all come to Cookie in the end."

Effy is no help at all as she is sat with an amused look on her face.

"Listen man, you're not my type, yeah?" I explain to him with a pointed look.

"Ohhh... Blondie – you've been holding out on me! _You're_ a muff-muncher?" he asks excitedly before turning to Effy, "You knew Eff, and didn't tell me? Thought you were my mate."

"Wasn't my business to tell," Effy explains with yet another shrug.

"What's not your business to tell?" Katie strolls into the room and plops down onto one of the chairs.

"Jesus, I _was_ having a private conversation with Effy before you lot barged in." I say with exasperation.

"I think you'll find there's no such thing as privacy in here babes," Katie says before adding, "now, what was it you were saying?"

I don't have time to respond before Freddie and JJ come into the room taking their seats within the circle, followed closely behind by Harriet.

"Perfect," Harriet says looking about the room, "it looks like everyone is here." She sits down in a chair and looks at the group expectantly.

Effy snorts.

"Was there something you wanted to say Effy?"

"Yes, actually there is. See, not _all_ of our group is here. Panda's in the QR and I won't start without her. As you've said before Harriet, we're a team, we depend on each other... and part of our team is missing. It's not right that we meet without her."

"Effy's right," I add, "Panda's a part of this group and she's needed. I won't be participating without her either."

Cook smiles brightly and chuckles, "Sorry, Harriet, I'm with them. Doesn't feel right without our Panda-pops."

Freddie gets up from his chair and joins me, Effy and Cook on the floor. "Ditto," he says simply.

JJ takes his cue from Freddie and pulls another mat out onto the floor and sits upon it adding, "Panda's like the glue to our group."

All eyes turn to Katie then who is looking at our dysfunctional little group with hesitance. "Oh, for fuck's sake," she says as she stands with our group, seemingly not wanting to sit on the ground.

Harriet looks at Katie in shock and then looks around at all of us sat on the floor in quiet protest for our missing friend. "It looks like you're all in agreement then," she says with a cautious smile.

"Alright guys, I'll see what I can do."

* * *

That night for dinner we are _all_ gathered around the same table, including our favorite pig-tailed blonde. We sit there for far longer than necessary stuffing our faces with doughnuts. After all, there is no better tribute to Panda.

* * *

**Katie's POV**

Damn Effy and that annoying-as-fuck Naomi. If it weren't for them I would still be in bed sleeping or perhaps looking through the latest edition of Heat. You know, important things. Instead I'm stood in the shower buying time for those losers whilst they comfort that nutter Pandora.

Those dumb bitches have absolutely no concept of time. We agreed that they only had two minutes to sort Pandora out before returning to the showers. Of course it doesn't work out that way does it?

I hear the door open and pop my head out of the stall and see Josie looking down at the jammed door with confusion. "What is this?" she asks no one in particular.

Fucking hell. We hadn't planned on her returning before Naomi and Effy had. _Think_.

"It was getting far too hot in here with all three showers going at once and _I_ have delicate skin," I explain.

"Oh, right," she says as she passes the first and second (empty) stalls and approaches mine with an outstretched hand holding my shower shoes.

"_Finally_. Took ages, that did."

Josie returns to her chair with a quiet apology and returns to her book. She softly mumbles the words as she reads them, occasionally making comments on what she's just read.

Why she doesn't just get her entertainment from the telly or internet like the rest of us, I'll never know. Reminds me a bit of Emily, she does. Stupid cows the both of them. Great, as if my mood wasn't bad before, now I'm reminded of my sister.

_Perfect_, fucking Emily with her _perfect_ fucking grades and her _perfect_ fucking attitude. Yeah, well she's _perfectly_ fucking boring. I mean, really. Her idea of a nice weekend is spending it on the couch watching old movies. Like super old movies – they don't even have color for fuck's sake. How twins can be this different, I'll never know. I suppose God ran out of awesome when he made me and had no option but to put boring filler in Emily. I should really try and have more pity for her.

Speaking of pity, "Josie dear, will you _please_ stop that constant muttering you're doing?"

I pour a liberal amount of shampoo into my hand and work the cream into a rich lather in my hair, massaging my scalp in the process. I hear some quiet shuffling outside the bathroom door and slowly pull back my curtain looking for the source. I see two shadows from the crack below the door. _Fucking useless twats._ How do they expect to return to the showers unseen? I mean they were both likely ignored in college, losers that they are, but they aren't _actually_ invisible. One could only wish... Well they can both get to fuck. What do I care if they get caught? Unless of course they narc on me. While I doubt Effy would do that, Naomi's a bit of a loose cannon... Jesus, why must I always sort everything?

I raise my voice to a level I hope that the girls can here and beckon Josie over. "Oh. My. God."

Josie looks to my stall in alarm, "Anything wrong Katie?"

I pull back my curtain forcefully and beckon her over. "Well, what are you waiting for? Come here Josie!"

I see Effy peek her head in the door while Josie walks over to my stall. With the nurse's back turned from the door, Effy and Naomi make their way into the room and slip into their showers once again, completely unseen.

"What is it?" Josie asks worriedly.

I point to my chin dramatically. "Is there a spot coming in?!"

The previously quiet room is then filled with the laughter of one slaggy brunette and her obnoxiously blonde sidekick.

* * *

You know, these people aren't just crazy – they are downright weird too. Honestly, I couldn't stand being with them any longer and left them all to continue gorging on simple carb filled doughnuts.

I make my way back to my room and slide my hand behind the nightstand, pulling off the taped paper. I know the rules, and really, I _should_ have read this note sooner, but my day hadn't gone exactly as planned had it? I hadn't intended on assisting those losers on their endeavor to save the planet, one nutter at a time. I unfold the note and start reading my sister's neat handwriting.

_Katie,_

_You __need__ to start attending Group Therapy – I'm serious. Foster will make good on his word and restrict your visitation privileges, so stop testing him! Now here's the bit I'm more than a little nervous to tell you... PLEASE don't freak out. Next weekend's visitation will be a family therapy session. I'm afraid there's not really any way around it. I'm sorry._

_In other news, I think there's a new girl starting today. Be nice, yeah? We didn't talk much, but she seems alright... maybe you could show her around? I think Foster would be pleased if you made some friends here. You know, "progress" and all that? _

_I really don't know how much longer I can keep this up, Katie – not with you fighting me like this. You know I'd do just about anything for you, but this is... __hard__. Just work the program, K, __please__. I want our lives back._

_I love you,_

_Ems_

* * *

**A/N**

**I'm not sure if the end of this chapter answered some questions or created new ones! If you have any theories, I'd love to hear them!**

**Alright, next chapter is from Katie's POV and should shed light on why Katie's at Delfino House. I'm hoping it will only take a chapter to tell her story, but it may end up being a two-parter like Naomi's. As of now, I've only planned to have Admitted chapters for Naomi & Katie but may also include Effy's at some point down the road. To be honest, I have a back story for nearly every character but if I have any hope of moving this fic along, I may need to nix them or perhaps do them as a series of one-shots. Let me know if you have a preference.**

**Until next time!**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	4. Admitted - Katie

**A/N:**

**Wow, okay. So this chapter took me far longer than I ever thought it would. It seems KFF ****_really_**** didn't want to be admitted (not sure I can blame her!) as this chapter was a complete bitch to write. It took ages to get this up and for that I apologize. **

**This chapter will take us away from our beloved Delfino House. If I'm honest, I kinda hated writing in a different location, but it had to be done. If it's any consolation, by the end of this chapter I can promise you two things. Firstly, Katie will be well and truly admitted, and secondly, her official diagnosis will be revealed.**

**This chapter hasn't really been proofed but I just really wanted to get it up, so read at your own risk!**

* * *

**Katie's POV**

I'm not one of those girls that has some romantic notion of boarding school. Emily on the other hand is about creaming her pants at the thought of being surrounded by nothing but girls and books – not sure which prospect she fancies more. I suppose she has me to thank for our current predicament.

I'm rifling through our shared closet determining what items to pack and which to leave behind. Or more accurately, pawn off on Emily. I look over at the pile of clothes on her bed and upon noticing a particularly cute dress, snatch it.

"Oi – that's mine, Katie!"

I look down at the garment and back at her with a pointed look, "Do you _really_ think you can pull something like this off?"

"I haven't even worn it yet," she argues taking the dress back.

I twist it out of her grasp. "Don't be selfish Emily, you don't even have the body for it." She looks at me with a frown before releasing it. I smile triumphantly and add it to my growing pile. "Besides, it's not exactly like you have anywhere to wear it to."

"It's not likely _you'll_ have anywhere to wear it once we're at Grayson's either."

I begin folding my belongings and tucking them into my suitcase. "You don't honestly think we'll be there long, do you? Mum and Dad never stick to their word, you know that."

"Yeah, well I don't see many other options at the moment, so yeah, I think we'll be there until Uni," she answers honestly.

"Don't be stupid, Emily. You're just hoping we do now that all your lezzer fantasies are finally being realized."

"Don't do that Katie, I'm being serious. You've been chucked out of nearly every respectable college in London – it's not my fault Mum's resorted to sending you to boarding school. And it's not exactly like I can let you go on your own, can I?"

"Stop pretending you're not loving it. You've wanted to go to boarding school since you read Harry Potter. Actually, if you think about it, I'm doing you a favor, really."

"Jesus, Katie, you really don't get it, do you?" Emily looks at me with obvious frustration.

Great, here comes the part where Emily tells me exactly what I'm doing wrong and how to fix it. I give her under one minute before she starts on her 'you have so much potential' bullshit. Gag. I continue packing while she drones on and on, only stopping when I hear mention of being 'cut off.'

"Cut off, who's cut off?" I ask with concern.

"Jesus, have you been listening to a word I've been saying?"

"Yeah, yeah, something about _potential_, second chances and all that..."

Emily walks over to my bed, taking the purple blouse I was folding and looks down sadly at it. "Do you remember when we got this? It was before Dad sold the gym and before Mum turned into a glorified Stepford wife."

I sit down on the bed opposite her and smile. "Yeah, Dad gave us 20quid each and told us to buy something nice for our birthday."

Emily smiles at the memory. "As soon as college let out that day, you dragged me to that awful shop you loved. We were in there not more than a minute before you found this," she says rubbing the soft fabric. "Problem was, it was 34quid."

"As I recall it was _60_ and I _bargained_ down to 34," I corrected.

She laughs, "Yes, that's right. Anyway, you didn't have enough money to get it."

"Things were a bit tight back then, yeah?" A bit tight was an understatement, we were shit broke and nearly homeless. That was before my Dad made a fortune re-branding and franchising his gym. Things were so different back then. It was harder, sure, but it was... simpler too. Not that I have a problem being rich. I mean, certain people are just meant to be surrounded by amazing, fabulous shit, and I am obviously one of them.

"But of course, that didn't stop you from wanting it. And, let's face it, you nearly always get what you want."

"Well it _was_ my birthday." I reasoned.

"It was mine too!"

"Yeah, well you didn't _have_ to give me your money."

"I know, but I wanted to," she says simply. "And that's the thing you need to realize Katie. I would do anything for you. You're not just my sister, you're... everything to me."

"Well, I _am_ pretty awesome, so..."

We both look at each other and laugh. "Yeah, you are Katie, you really are."

After a quiet moment, she looks up at me with tear filled eyes. "But here's the thing I need to know. Would you do anything for _me_?"

"God, Emily, do you need a kidney or something? What's with the melodrama?"

"Just answer the bloody question, Katie," Emily shouts. To say I was surprised wouldn't even cover my shock at hearing her tone.

"Fuck's sake, Emily, you _know_ I would."

She smiles sadly, "Really?"

"Of course, you twat. I mean unless you wanna borrow my Chanel earrings or something, cause I'm sorry, no sisterly love is worth that."

"No worries, I won't be asking for them. There's actually something far more that I want," she says hesitantly.

"Well, go on then."

"Don't screw this up Katie. Give Grayson's a chance. Go to classes, do your coursework, keep your head down and please, _please_ don't shag any teachers."

"He wasn't a teacher, Jesus – he was an aide!"

"You're missing the point entirely."

I sigh. "Yeah, okay, I get it. You want me on my best behavior."

"Please."

I cross my arms over my chest before huffing dramatically. "Fine, but you owe me."

She jumps off from the bed and leaps onto me, making me fall back onto her bed and suitcase.

"Getoffme!" I shout, albeit muffled.

She climbs off me, and circles her arms around my waist and kisses my head, "You are the best!"

"Obviously."

* * *

Grayson's School for Young Ladies is a shit hole. I don't mean that it's rundown or dirty – it isn't. It _is_ however, boring as fuck and my very own personal brand of hell. Snotty girls from old money who look their noses down on me and Ems for no other reason than pure jealousy. Granted, their jealousy isn't misplaced, but I digress.

Rooms are shared between four girls. Allow me to repeat that so you grasp the full impact of such a horror – rooms are shared between FOUR girls. Fucking sadists. Being the generous person I am, I hardly mumble an unkind word as I settle into the prison that is Grayson's.

You know the worst part? Emily is in her fucking element. She attends all her classes, does her coursework and even does our chores rotation with a bloody smile on her face.

"Do you enjoy washing up the floors or have you simply had a stroke?"

Emily turns around from scrubbing the floors, and looks up at me, "Huh?"

"You're smiling again and not in a good way. You look... dopey. What are you so happy about?"

She rolls her eyes before turning around and attending to the floors again. "Can't I just be happy?"

I scrunch my face in response before sitting down on the nearest bed, twirling the duster in my hands, "No," I answer simply.

She scoffs. "I can't be happy?"

"No Ems you can't – not if _I'm_ unhappy. You're being a right selfish cow, you are."

She looks up at me with confusion. "What are you on about?"

Does she not see how good I've been? Does she not understand how hard it's been to not do the things that I normally do? It's physically painful sometimes, holding back these impulses, these urges. Like the one that wanted to beat the living shit out of Presley. But no, she's too caught up in her new friends and classes to notice.

I stand up and walk towards the door, "Nothing, forget it." At the last moment, I grab a jumper and storm out. I don't have any idea where I'm going, I just know that I need to get away and fast. I descend the main set of stairs leading into the grand foyer when I run into Miss Wick.

"Hello, Miss, you're looking," I say as I allow my gaze to look at her attire, "...lovely," and smile widely. If anyone's wondering, dung-brown stockings and gray penny loafers is a look no one should attempt.

"Miss Fitch, I missed you in class today," she says by way of greeting.

"Ah, yes," I cough then, patting my chest, "bit of a cough you see."

She smiles tightly. "Then you best go to the infirmary, yes?"

"That's _precisely_ where I'm headed," I smile and begin to walk away.

"Miss Fitch?" I turn around in response. She points to a doorway near the base of the stairs, "It's that way."

I make my way to the door and look back at the teacher with one last smile before going through. I close the door behind me and wait to hear departing footsteps signaling that she has left the foyer. However, it seems Miss Wick is more clever than her fashion dictates as I hear nothing. I am in a long but narrow corridor lined with many doors. I see a small gold plaque on the wall with the words 'Infirmary' and a bold arrow pointing to the right. I peer down the right side of the hallway briefly before walking towards the left. I walk a ways down the corridor occasionally opening doors and peering inside to find several storage and mechanical rooms. It doesn't take long to open a door revealing a small landing with a set of both ascending and descending stairs.

I close the door behind me decide on going downwards. The stairs wind around so that I can't make out where they are leading. Fortunately, as I continue it gets brighter until I am found in a corridor outside of the kitchens. I look at a large antique icebox and peer behind it noticing a room that must have been used as a loading/unloading area. I smile brightly when I see a door leading outside.

* * *

As the wind hits me, I pull on the jumper and rub my hands together and lean back into the cold wall.

"Bit nippy, eh?"

I turn my head casually to the right, just to find a guy a little older than me stood next to a blue truck filled with large boxes on a flatbed. "Oh, I don't know," I say as I slip a flask out of my pocket and take a large gulp, "feels alright to me." I hold up the flask and tip it towards him in invitation with a slight quirk of my eyebrow.

He chuckles then and walks towards me taking my offering and leaning his head back with a large gulp of his own. He winces as he swallows. "Wouldn't have pegged you for the whiskey sort."

"I don't think you know me well enough to 'peg' me for anything," I say taking the flask back and walking towards the truck. As I reach the handle of the door on the passenger side of the truck I turn back to the boy, "You coming then?"

He didn't need to be asked twice. Boys never do, do they? Our first of many shags in his truck was a bit... clumsy. But he _was_ malleable and he soon learned exactly how to please me. Cole, I would later learn, worked for a local grocer who provided all of the school's food and other sundries. He got the job on recommendation of his father who worked for the school tending to the grounds. Cole's job was a huge blessing as it gave me access to booze and other necessities.

When I finally returned to my room I was met by my scowling sister. "Where were you?"

"None of your business," I say as I take my shoes off, remove my jumper and lay back on my bed. "Room looks good," I add looking around to the now cleaned floors and dusted furniture.

Emily sits at the foot of the bed, poking my leg, "Yeah, no thanks to you."

"You know I'm shit when it comes to the domestics, babes."

She rolls her eyes in response and looks at me in question. "How ya doing Katiekins?"

"Ugh, don't call me that," I say kicking her with my outstretched foot.

She moves from the end of my bed to sit next to me, leaning back on the headboard. "Well?"

I see her looking at me from my peripheral, "Fine," I answer.

She sighs before bumping her shoulder into mine, "I'm proud of you, you know?"

I snort and elbow her in the ribs. She recovers, rubbing her side and smiles, "It's true. You've been trying just like you promised and I... I just appreciate it, yeah?"

"Ugh, stop being such a sap Ems," I say but can't help the smile threatening to escape from my pursed lips.

_Maybe I _**could**_ do this after all._

* * *

Presley Lewis, was a cute if not prissy looking Head Girl who had not been very subtle at trying to impress me and bring me into her clique. Of course in order to cement my HBIC status, I knew I had to continue rebuffing and belittling her. But I immediately knew she would be useful. She was eager to please and had just the slightest hint of the potential for meanness in her pale blue eyes. After shaping and molding Presley into the perfect minion I would systematically go through the roster of girls, hand selecting a few more for a clique of my very own. I don't get invited into queen bee groups – I create them.

The day, I would finally throw Presley a bone was the beginning of the end really. From that point forward, my life would unravel.

* * *

I was painting my nails a smoking shade of red when Presley came bursting into the room with barely contained excitement. Upon seeing my disapproving gaze, she settles down smoothing out her skirt and moves some blonde curls behind her ear before continuing. "A bit of good news," she smiles looking at each of us, "I've just heard Headmistress Clarke chatting with Miss Wick about having a scheduled outing on Saturday."

The news is met with joyous exclaims and clapping from our other room mate, and mini-Presley, a girl called Lexie.

Emily who had been reading next to me, closes her book, "Where to?" she asks with interest.

"Well... just into town," Presley answers sheepishly, before she continues, "but there are some cool shops and cafes."

"Well that sounds fun," Emily says before turning to me, "doesn't it Katie?"

I snort in way of response, lifting my hands to my face and blowing on my newly painted fingernails. I begin to apply a thick layer of the expensive top coat gel that Cole special ordered for me.

Emily regards Presley apologetically. "Well, I'm sure we will all have a good time."

"Oh, I'm sure we will," Lexie assures. "Plus it gives us a chance to pick up a few... _items_ for the dance," she finishes with a conspiratorial tone.

"What sort of 'items'?" I ask as I screw the lid back onto the small glass container.

Lexie laughs nervously, "You _know_, just some drinks and the like."

I quirk my head to the side in interest and the girl visibly brightens at the change in my mood. "And where does one acquire said items?"

Lexie begins to answer before being interrupted by Presley who then gets up and sits next to me on the bed. "Well, there's the grocer in town and if you slip him a few extra quid..." she answers with a smirk that looks unnatural on her. _Very interesting._

* * *

"Don't be a pussy!"

I'm sat with Cole in his beat up truck at the bottom of a steep hill on the school grounds. It's a place we often come to – close enough to the school to sneak away easily, but far from prying eyes. I look at him expectantly and when I'm met with no response I gruff dramatically, "Fine!" I open the car door and stomp away heading back towards the school.

He jumps out of the car and jogs up to me, calling, "Katie, babes, wait!"

I continue walking, not intending on making it easy for him. I finally stop when he reaches out to my shoulders and stops me.

I cross my arms across my chest, "What?"

He slides his hands from my shoulders, down my arms and entwines his fingers in mine. "I didn't say no, babe... I just need to think about it," he explains.

"What's there to think about? It sounds like you do it every other year, what's different now?" I demand.

"Selling a couple drinks to minors here or there is one thing – what you're talking about is different!"

I release my hands from his and move them to his chest, "Perhaps on a _slightly_ larger scale, yes, but essentially it's the same..." I explain as I continue rubbing my fingers soothingly against him.

He runs his hands through his hair, "I don't know, it's just..." he sighs.

He's nervous and I expected that, but really he needs to just grow a pair. With the help of Presley, I've convinced nearly every girl at Grayson's that I can get them whatever they need, from your basic booze to your designer drugs. As the middle man (or woman, as it were) I would be assuring myself not only a healthy profit but also a great deal of power over these trust fund bitches. I need to get Cole on board and don't possess the patience to coddle him. But I'm not worried. Men are simple creatures, and I've yet to meet one that can't be manipulated.

"Okay then babes, I understand," I say softly as I leave a light kiss on the tip of his nose.

He looks at me astonished, "Really? You're not mad?"

"Don't be silly, Cole, of course I'm not. It was just an idea really... I just wanted to do it for us, you know?" I turn from him with a sad smile and feign wiping away a tear.

"For _us_?" He asks, placing his hands on my hips, turning me back around to face him, "What do you mean?"

"It's silly, don't worry about it," I say dismissively.

"No, no, explain it to me?"

"I just thought we had something, know?"

"We do, babes, honest. I've never met anyone like you before. You're...well, you're amazing," he says with a dopey smile. He leans into me and kisses me deeply. "I love you. I wanna be with you forever Katie."

"Me too," I say quietly with a waver in my voice.

"You do?"

I lift my hands in the air slightly, "Obviously."

He encases his arms around my bum and lifts me up and spins me around with ease as he kisses me sloppily. He carries me to the back of his truck and pulls me into his lap draping a heavy blanket onto us. His hands wrap around my waist and he begins to press kisses softly onto my neck, slowly lowering them down to my shoulders. "Say something?"

"I want us to start a life together Cole – _away_ from here." When I am met with silence, I turn my head and look into his eyes just to be met with a blank expression.

He closes his eyes briefly and smiles, "_That's_ why you suggested this... business venture?"

I smile coquettishly.

"You _are_ brilliant, aren't you?"

_You have no idea._

* * *

Business is going well... you might even say it's booming I have officially become not only the most popular girl in school but also the most powerful.

Presley enters the dining hall with a shit eating grin. She unceremoniously pushes Lexie aside, taking the seat next to me.

"Got some new orders," she announces happily waving a piece of paper in front of her.

I regard her casually and beckon for the note. I am reading through the list when Emily joins us at the table. I put the paper down, taking care to fold it before putting it in the pocket on my jumper.

"Can you believe Wilson's assignment? I've spent nearly a week in the library just researching and developing an outline. What about you lot, how's it coming along?"

"I'm nearly finished although I'm not completely happy with it. Honestly, I can only get through a few lines of Virgil before I want to throw myself out a window," Lexie complains.

Emily laughs before turning to me and Presley, "and you guys?"

"My older sister sent me hers from a couple years back. Been using it as a guide, so it won't take me long," the blonde explains.

Lexie stares at her blonde friend with an open mouth, "Lucky bitch," she accuses as she elbows her playfully.

We all share a laugh before all eyes are on me. But I'm only concerned with the chocolate pair that are boring into my skull.

"I'm done," I say with a shrug.

Emily's eyes narrow and her brows furrow. She begins to say something before Presley pipes up, before announcing happily, "You're so clever Katie!"

I nod in agreement, "Yeah I am, aren't I?"

Emily closes her mouth in a tight line and returns to her meal, not adding any more to the conversation.

* * *

"Why is it so hard for you to think that I've changed?"

Emily dragged me up to our room after we had finished supper explaining to the girls that we needed some 'sister time.' I'm now sitting on a chair in our room untying the laces on my shoes as I look at my twin.

"I'm not saying you haven't changed Katie, I'm just wondering how you were able to complete Wilson's assignment."

"Oh, so now you think I'm dumb?"

"That's not what I'm saying!"

"Isn't it? What you're _really_ wondering is how I could have possibly finished the assignment _before_ you."

She doesn't respond to my claim immediately. She just sighs and shakes her head. "Look, I'm sorry. I know you're smart, way more than people think. I guess I was just surprised that you had finished since I have yet to see you work on it," she explains.

"Well, you wouldn't have seen me, what with you in the library all week, would you?"

"...I suppose not..." she says recalling all her time spent secluded.

"Great, sorted," I say as I stand up and begin changing into my pyjamas. I'm pulling my shirt over my head when she asks if she can see it. "See what?" I ask as I pull my hair out from under my top.

"You know... the assignment?"

"Oh," I say as I pump some lotion into my hands and begin rubbing the cream onto my arms. "Maybe tomorrow?"

She cocks her head to the side and regards me suspiciously. "Why I can't I see it now?"

"Jesus, Emily, I'm sick at looking at the damn thing."

"Well _you're_ not the one that's going to be looking at it, I am," she reasons.

I narrow my eyes at her. "You _still_ don't believe me!" She doesn't have time to respond as I walk over to my small desk and pull out a folder from the drawer. I stalk over to my sister and shove it into her chest. "Fuck you," I spit out.

* * *

I found that my business venture had some unintended but very much appreciated perks. One of them was called Deborah Reeves. A very clever girl with a rather unfortunate addiction to vodka and laxatives. Unfortunately for her, she had _run through_ (pun intended) her parent's monthly allowance and was unable to pay for her... necessities. The generous person I am, I accepted Wilson's assignment as payment with the assurance that any other coursework I needed, she was more than willing to barter with.

Of course, Emily doesn't know that and so her blatant disbelief in me is fucking insulting. I mean, I _could_ have done the cunting thing. I hate her, I really do. And after _all_ I do for her. Fucking. Ungrateful. Bitch.

* * *

I consult the clipboard in my hands and count out the bottles of vodka and grunt. "What the fuck Presley, there should be a dozen of Smirnoff – where are the rest?"

She looks at me worriedly before looking through all of the boxes. We are sat in a storage room in the attic, a place we have appropriated as the headquarters for Fitch Enterprises.

"Err... they should be here somewhere," she says nervously before coming upon a box with the crisp clear liquid. "Here it is!"

"Fuck sakes, Presley, you need to sort through this mess. How many times do I need to explain that alcohol goes there," I point to a corner before continuing, "cigarettes there, feminine products on that shelf, miscellaneous items in the cabinet and... _the rest_... in the lock box."

"Sorry, Katiekins, I'll sort it after X-Factor."

_Ugh, I've already warned her about calling me that._ I walk over to the blonde with a predatory smile, "No babes, you'll sort it now, yeah?" I tuck a long blonde curl behind her ear. "And when you're done, you come find me in the lounge and you _just_ might make it for the results segment." I finish my statement by flicking her on the nose.

I see a brief look of hatred pass through her eyes before she catches herself. "Yeah, yeah, of course," she responds. I nod at her with a smile and begin to walk away.

"Enjoy the show... _Katiekins_," she says with a hint of sarcasm.

I turn around and size her up. It usually takes a bit longer before the minions start to get ideas – start thinking for themselves... and _that_ is a dangerous thing. This needs fixing and now.

I walk over to the small mini-fridge Cole was able to procure and pull out a chilled bottle of Smirnoff. "You know, I never did like Louis Walsh," I say as I sit on an old couch and take a swig of the alcohol, "What do you say to having our own bit of fun?"

It doesn't take long for Presley to become completely munted. Bitch cannot hold her liquor... nor can she hold her tongue apparently. After a bit of gentle prodding, she sang like the proverbial canary, divulging both personal and family secrets alike. Secrets that were most useful.

* * *

Saturday was rainy and dreary completely ruining my plans to steal a few private moments with Cole at the bottom of our hill. Instead I found myself with _my_ girls in the lounge watching shit TV and reading through the latest glossies. Presley had yet to come down from our room, even missing breakfast, presumably nursing a major hangover. I wouldn't make any hurry to come down if I were her. For this morning's breakfast was accompanied with a side of Lewis family scandal. I _may_ have divulged to a few of the most talkative girls at Grayson's _all_ about how her family recently paid out a small fortune on a sexual harassment suit involving the patriarch's secretary – cliché, I know.

I was flipping through the latest issue of Hello when the room got quiet apart from a few whispers. Presley had walked into the room and was met with awkward looks and hushed words. She looked about the room curiously before walking to the couch where Lexie and I were sitting. The entire room looks at the scene playing before them. Watching to see what their leader will do.

"Alright, guys?" she asks us.

I look over at Lexie, "What do you think of this dress babes?"

She takes the hint, and scoots closer to me examining the magazine, "Cute, but it would look way better on you Katie."

"Mmm, fair point," I say casually as I flip the page. Now that I've set the tone on how to handle Presley – and by handle I mean blatantly ignore and alienate, a tool of which I've use with much success before – the rest of the girls fall in line and do as I do.

The rest of the day continues in much the same way with Presley being all but ostracized and it all culminates later that day at lunch in the dining hall.

Presley walks to our usual table with a tear stained face and red rimmed eyes. "Katie, can I talk to you?"

I frown at my salad and look at Lexie, "Is it just me or is the spinach a bit off?"

Emily watches me from across the table with a frown. "_Katie_ – Presley just asked you something."

I put my fork down and look at my twin before responding, "Oh? I hadn't heard anything."

Presley takes the opportunity to sit next to me and asks,"Why are you doing this? What did I do?" with imploring, almost desperate eyes.

I sigh before turning to the blonde, "What _are_ you going on about?"

"You... you're ignoring me, _everyone_ is ignoring me," she says looking about the room.

"Don't be silly, you're just being sensitive. Not everything is about you," I say as I return to my salad.

"I need to talk to you, Katie... _privately,_" she says before looking at Emily and back at me with a pointed look.

I close my eyes and breathe in, making a show of trying to keep my patience with the pathetic girl sitting next to me. "Just go away, yeah?"

"No, Katie – I don't think I will. I've done nothing but fucking help you. I've done everything you wanted at great personal risk I might add, and _now_ you're blanking me?"

That's it. She should be fucking grateful I _allowed_ her to assist me. "Listen, Blondie. I've no idea what you're going on about, what I _do_ know is that you need to stay away from me. I don't associate with... well, _you_. "

I make way to leave when she grabs my arm and stops me. "You can't do this to me, I won't let you," she says shaking her head.

I am keenly aware that the entire room is gripped by the spectacle before them. I take great care in projecting my voice. "I've already _told_ you Presley, I'm _not_ interested. I like boys, yeah? Please leave me alone," I say as I grab my arm back from her and cross it over my chest. It is in that moment that she looks around the room and notices that all eyes and consequently all ears are on us. She looks at me completely defeated before running from the large room in tears. It takes all my strength to hide the smirk threatening to betray my amusement. As I return to my place at the table, Emily gets up and slams her tray in the bin and storms away.

* * *

**Emily's POV**

I've been pacing my room for the last ten minutes. I'm terrified of stopping, for when I do, I know the reality of what I must do will finally settle in – and that's something I'm not prepared for. Not yet, anyway. I walk over to my nightstand and pick up the framed photograph of me and Katie on holiday last summer. We'd gone to the beach for a long weekend after she convinced me that she wouldn't take me out with her until I got a decent tan. I relented of course, cause I always do – it's just... easier.

People think Katie's a bitch, and don't get me wrong, _she is_, but she's also a lot more than that. She's beautiful, fierce, protective and even a bit fragile – although I'd never admit the latter to her. No one sees that side. I do. I know her better than anyone. I think I may even know her better than she knows herself. And it's for that reason that I'm scared. If I'm honest with myself, I've been scared for a long time. You see, there's one more word that I can use to describe her.

I look at the picture more closely. She has a brilliant smile and that look in her eye – the one that draws people to her like a moth to a flame. And like a flame she has the power to illuminate the world around her but also the power to rob it of her light. When you lose it – her light – you hang on to every shred of hope that she will grace you with it once more. That's why she's dangerous. Yes, that's the word; dangerous.

Silent tears drip down my face and I know my decision is made. I return the frame to my table before turning to Presley. "Let's go see Headmistress Clarke."

* * *

**Katie's POV**

I'll admit, perhaps I should have handled Presley a bit better. I didn't realize that she could exercise the use of her backbone – or so quickly. Within a matter of hours my ledger detailing the ins and outs of my business and my beloved 'headquarters' were found. My parents were called and informed of my... transgressions. I was sequestered in a private room near the Headmistress's office and denied access to everyone _including_ Emily. After a day of complete isolation other than meals being brought up to me, I was finally allowed out of the room. Unfortunately for me, I would soon learn that I was merely trading one prison for another.

As I walked into Clarke's office I was immediately shocked to see my parents sat in two chairs opposite the stern woman. Immediately to her left was a man I'd never met.

"What are you guys doing here?"

My Dad gets up to greet me with a hug and places a kiss on the top of my head. "We got a call yesterday telling us we had to come right away," he explains before returning to his chair. My Mum is sitting cross legged with an elbow on her leg, hand covering her mouth, eyes looking anywhere but at me.

"Sit _down_ Katie," she says through tight lips.

_Aw, fuck_. I sit down in the empty chair next to my parents and prepare for the all too familiar expulsion process to begin.

The unfamiliar man leans his head to the right, Clarke meeting him halfway before he whispers something to her. She nods in response before addressing me.

"Katie, there are many things I would like to say to you, but after a very long discussion with your parents and Dr. Foster," she cocks her head to the side, indicating the man next to her, "I'm afraid, the point is moot. We've all agreed that at this point the most beneficial thing to do is move forward."

I smile while I begin to stand, "Sounds good to me. I'll just go now whilst you lot talk the particulars and what not."

My mother's hands finds my wrist, squeezing it tightly as she all but forces me back into the chair. "Jesus, aggro much?" I respond rubbing my arm.

"Do you have _any_ idea what we had to leave behind to come here and... _deal_... with this? We were _this_ close to closing a very lucrative deal in the States. Now, sit down and don't get up until you're told."

I look to my Dad for help, but he shakes his head telling me to listen to my Mum. I turn my head and huff in defeat before looking back at Clarke, "You were saying?"

Before the headmistress has the chance to respond, Dr. Foster interrupts her, "I'm Dr. Foster," he states as he extends his hand to me. I reach over the desk and shake his hand, "Katie," I say lamely.

The doctor responds with a smile, "Yes, Katie, I've heard a lot about you."

"Yeah? From who?" I question.

He shrugs slightly, "From your parents, teachers and... friends."

I snort and shake my head. "Well people like to tell lies about me, so don't believe everything you hear."

He nods his head, "You're right, people do lie. It's in our nature's really. But tell me, why do you feel people are lying about you?"

I look at him suspiciously, "What sort of doctor are you?"

"I'm a clinical psychiatrist," he answers plainly.

I burst out in uncontrolled laughter. I open my mouth to speak, but the laughter continues, forcing me to hold my stomach in pain. I hear my Mum scolding me but it still takes several moments to compose myself.

"Oh God, _that_ is good! Listen, I'm sorry everyone's wasted your time and all that but the only person needing a head doctor is this lot," I explain indicating my parents and Clarke.

My Mum gets up from her seat then and takes some documents out of her coat's pocket. She stalks over to the desk and grabs a pen from a cup and begins to flip through the pages, periodically signing.

"You were right. We can't do this anymore. I mean she's utterly uncontrollable. Now, I don't understand what this, this... _BPD_ is, but you seem to. So you'll sort this?"

"Mrs. Fitch, I know I can help Katie," Dr. Foster replies with a smile.

My Dad walks up behind my Mum, turning her around to face him. "You can't be serious about doing this Jenna – we need to think this through, talk about it. I mean, what about Emily?"

"What about her? She's doing great here, Rob. In fact, she might do even better without her sister here. How much longer can we keep this up? Moving them from school to school?"

"I know, honey, I know. This just seems so... drastic," he explains.

"Mr. Fitch, I can sympathize, I really can. This is your _daughter_ – you love her, want what's best for her. You're a father who is worried about his little girl. Well, I can tell you that you have reason to worry. I wouldn't recommend Delfino House without reason. I assure you that this is what is best for Katie... and to be perfectly honest? Also, what is best for Emily."

My Dad looks to my Mum, who nods and then he looks at me.

"Dad, what the actual fuck is going on?"

He closes his sad looking eyes briefly before taking the pen from my Mum and signing the papers.

* * *

**Inpatient Admission Form**

**Patient Name:** Fitch, Katherine A.

**Date of Birth:** 06.05.1992

**Sex/Gender:** Female

**Occupation:** Minor/Student

**Parent/Guardian: **Rob & Jenna Fitch

**Referral Source:** John Foster, MD

**Current Living Arrangements:** Minor, with parents

**Facility:** Delfino House

**Primary symptom described in 'specific observable behavior' that requires acute hospital care:**

Care is requested by parents after chronic episodes of risky, impulsive behavior. Promiscuity, and drug/alcohol abuse have also been observed. Destructive behavior resulting in multiple expulsions have ultimately led to admittance.

**Past psychiatric treatment:**

None

**Present and past alcohol/drug usage:**

Class A drugs and alcohol present in screening

**Psychiatric medications:**

None at time of admission

**Admitting diagnosis (Axis I): **None suspected at time of admittance

**Admitting diagnosis (Axis II): **Borderline & Narcissistic Personality Disorders

**Physical injuries upon admittance:**

None

**No. of hospital days requested:**

30 days upon re-evaluation as regulated – additional time as needed

**Projected length of stay:**

8 – 12 weeks

**In-patient care plan:**

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with use of mood stabilizing medication/s

**Aftercare plan:**

Ongoing therapy with approved psychologist, consulting with psychiatrist

**Signature of Attending MD:**

John M. Foster, MD

* * *

**A/N:**

**Alright, there we have Katie: Admitted. I truly hope it didn't disappoint. **

**Next chapter will bring us back to Delfino House and all of it's crazy inhabitants. Note I use the word crazy from a place of community, not judgement! *retreats to QR 2* )**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	5. Monopoly & Other Games

**A/N:**

**Hi guys! Since I was over a week late on Chap 4 I thought I'd put Chap 5 up a bit early! So the POV's change a couple times but hopefully not in a way that confuses. I think this chapter should answer quite a few questions regarding Emily and Katie. But believe me when I say the twists and turns are still a-coming. To everyone asking about when Emily will become more involved in the story... soon, I promise! I think the set up is just about at the point where we can get this train moving. Toot!**

* * *

**Naomi's POV**

"You're killing me Blondie, fucking nailing me to the wall you are!" Cook shouts as he begins counting money and slams it in front of me.

I snatch the colorful bills from the center of the board and begin to count it. "As I recall you could have purchased Park Place on your second go but opted not to. Not my fault you have no knack for the real estate market," I say flippantly as I place the newly earned money in my growing pile.

"_You_ said it wasn't a good investment!" he argues back.

I shrug with a satisfied smile as the group laughs at Cook's misfortune. When everyone tires of their goating, Effy picks up the dice and casually drops them onto the board's center. She takes her thimble and counts out the six places before landing upon Free Parking.

Cook hisses, "You've rigged it!"

Effy takes the money that had been accumulating for three rounds and smiles happily as she hands half of her earnings to Pandora. "Whizzer Eff, thanks!"

Cook looks from the board, to Effy, to Pandora then to me, "Nah, they're cheating, they must be!"

"Don't be a sore loser, mate. It's a game of luck and strategy. It'll come around," Freddie says as he examines the board.

"I'm going to nip to my room and get a sweater, shall I bring some tissues back, Cookie?"

"You think you're cute, Blondie, huh?"

I get up from my chair and smile at him, "Well, _you_ certainly think I am."

I begin to walk away and call back, "Stop looking at my bum Cook," without turning around.

"Oooooh, she totally got you mate," Freddie exclaims as he claps Cook on his shoulder bringing the whole group into laughter.

* * *

I flip on the switch to my bedroom, turning on the light. I rummage through my chest of drawers and pull out a jumper. Looking down at my clothes I realize that I'm going to need more and soon. I begin to walk down the corridor wondering when I'll be able to call my Mum when I pass by Katie's room. She's laid in bed, back against the headboard, legs crossed at the ankle reading a magazine.

"Are you just going to perve at the door or are you going to come in?" she asks not bothering to look up.

"Is that an invitation?" I ask with shock in my voice.

She shrugs in answer. I look back down the corridor knowing that I must be holding up the game, but I can't help it when I find my feet walking towards the bed opposite her.

"Anything interesting?"

She puts the magazine down, folding it, and lays back in the bed, hands balled into fists and slams them near her sides like a child. "God, I'm bored!"

"You should come to the CR then. Better than being locked up in here by yourself."

She turns onto her side and looks at me with furrowed brows, "Yes, but then I would have to, you know, hang out with _them_."

"Ah, now _there's_ the Katie we all know and loathe," I spit out and begin to leave.

"Don't."

I turn around and raise my eyebrows in question.

"Don't go," she repeats before adding, "please, alright?"

I look at the redhead uncertainly, "...um, why?"

"I don't know... you just seem more... normal than the others and I'm bored."

I sigh as I resign myself to staying and cautiously walk to her bed sitting down. Neither of us says anything for a while and I find myself swinging my legs back and forwards waiting for her to break the silence. I get a tingling feeling on the side of my face, the type that indicates someone's watching you.

"What?" I say as I smooth out my hair, "Do I have something on my face?"

"No, though you do need sorting."

"Pardon?"

Katie laughs before reaching over to her nightstand and pulling out some small boxes. As she does so, a piece of paper falls from the drawer. Katie is too distracted to notice this as she begins opening various containers. The paper is open and I don't have time to make out much else besides the words, "I love you," followed by the signature "Ems."

"You dropped this," I say as I hold out the paper towards Katie.

She looks down at it before folding it up and placing it back into the drawer with a snap. "Alright, are you ready?"

"_For_?"

She regards me with one of those faces you give a child who still wets the bed at ten, "For your makeover," she says slowly as if I would have trouble conceptualizing her words.

I begin to laugh and when my laughter isn't joined by hers, I realize she isn't joking. "Yeah... about that... the thing is... yeah, _no_."

"_The thing is_," she says mimicking me, "you are pasty and have no color or definition. You're like a fucking corpse. It's almost painful to look at you."

I scrunch up my face, "Thanks?"

"Ugh, don't be sensitive. I just mean you look sickly."

I shake my head and stand up to leave, "You know, you're a lot more tolerable with your mouth closed." I say as I storm out the room and begin to walk back towards the Common Room.

My Mum has always said that everyone has a story, a story that has led them to where they are right now. As much as I hate to admit it, I have found that she is right. She's also always told me something else; that there is good, even if just a little, in all people. In moments like this I think how wrong my mother is, for she has never met Katie Fucking Fitch.

"Jesus, slow down!" Katie barks as she struggles to keep up with me. She finally gains on me and moves in front with both hands raised, "Stop, okay?" She looks around the hallway and whispers, "I didn't mean it in a bad way, yeah?"

I cross my hands over my chest and raise my eyebrows, "Since when does someone looking sickly imply anything good?"

"No, I just meant, that you didn't _have_ to look that way. Like, you could look better."

I shake my head in confusion, "So you thought you could sort my face because it needs fixing?"

Katie closes her eyes in frustration and sighs, "Alright, listen carefully because I'm only going to say this once. I'm...," she turns her head to the side, considering what to say next, "..._regretful_ that..."

"Yes, Katie? You're _regretful_ that, what?"

"...that _you_ misunderstood what I meant to say," she finishes before smiling triumphantly.

I purse my lips and cover them with my hand to keep from laughing but once I see that she is struggling to do the same, I release it.

* * *

"I can't move my face!"

"You'd think you'd stop talking then! Just sit still and shut up," Katie chastises as she continues to rub the green mud mask onto my face. I attempt to roll my eyes before I realize I have them closed. It is then that I notice the smell.

"It smells a bit off?"

Katie shakes her head, "Honestly, do you ever shut up? How do I turn you off?"

I snort in response. _Well, you're certainly not turning me __**on**__ that's for sure. _

"There," she says. I feel her get up from the bed before instructing me to sit still whilst she gets some towels. It isn't long before she returns to the room grumbling about how 'simple' the nurses are. The bed dips down and I feel some moist heat in front of my face before it is met by a warmed towel.

"We're going to keep this on for a minute and let your pores open up," she says pressing the cloth into my skin.

"Mm-hmm," I mumble. I hate to admit it, but this feels good – relaxing even. A few minutes pass and Katie announces that it's time to remove the mask. She takes the cloth off my face and hands me a new one and instructs me to rub it off in an upward motion. I follow her instructions before she grabs the towel from me. "Not like that, you mong," she replies shaking her head. She begins to rub my face with the soft cloth, periodically folding it in on itself.

When my face is finally free of the smelly concoction, I open my eyes and scrunch up my face, placing my fingers on my cheeks feeling the newly softened flesh.

"Oi, don't touch – you've _just_ cleansed it!" Katie scolds as she slaps my hands away.

"Alright, alright," I grumble, "So is my face sorted now?"

Katie sighs, "Well, it's certainly better than when we began..."

"Oh, fuck off."

We both turn our heads over to the door when we hear knocking on the wall. Stood there is Effy leaning casually against the door frame. "Well don't you guys look cozy?"

"Ugh, what do you want, _Elizabeth_?" Katie asks, clearly annoyed at the interruption.

Effy smirks as she enters the room and stands next to me beginning to play with my hair. "Oh, just wondering where everyone's favorite blonde got off to."

"I thought that would have been your _precious_ Panda," Katie sneers.

Effy ignores Katie before addressing me. "Ramona decided it was best if we took a break from the game as it got a bit... heated," she says through a cheeky smile.

"Do I even want to know what did Cook did?" I ask the brunette.

"Let's just say that the place where he threatened to shove the little dog into wasn't very... _nice_."

Katie looks between the two of us as we begin to chuckle. "You guys are seriously gross, do you know that?" she surmises.

"Aww, that hurts Katiekins," Effy pouts.

"How about you just fuck off now Effy?" Katie says whilst making a shooing motion with her hand.

Effy smiles at the redhead before turning to me. "I promised Panda I'd ask you if you'd let her braid your hair for the movie tonight? She seems to think you'd look _adorable_ with pigtails."

"Pigtails?" I ask incredulously. "That's not really my style..."

"I wasn't aware you had a st-." Katie begins before I look at her with a quirked brow. She rolls her eyes in response.

Effy looks at our exchange in interest before Ramona comes into the room. "Checks," she says before making notes on her clipboard. "Oh, and Naomi, you have an individual with Dr. Foster in ten minutes. Best start heading down there."

Once the nurse leaves, I stand up from the bed and bite my lip painfully.

"Come on Campbell," Effy says taking my arm, "I'll walk down with you."

We begin to walk out the room before I turn around to the redhead. "Err... thanks?"

I watch Katie as she leans back in the bed, returning to her magazine. "Yeah, whatever."

* * *

"Alright?" Effy asks as we walk down the hallway.

"Yeah, fine," I say.

She laughs softly before pulling me to a bench in the main corridor. "Sit with me for a minute. I promise I won't make you late," she says patting the space next to her. "You're a shit liar you know?"

I sigh and nod. "Never used to be. I was always good at it... lying."

"What changed?"

"Everything."

"Yeah, I hate it when that happens," she says, bumping her shoulder into mine.

I smile sadly at my new friend. "I don't know what I'm going to do once I go in there," I confess. "What would _you_ do?" I ask.

"Are you asking _me_ for advice?" she chuckles.

"Come on, Eff," I say almost pleading, "besides, Panda says you're 'all-knowing' and shit."

"Mmm, good point," she says smiling. "Alright, Campbell, this is what you're going to do. You're going to go meet with Foster and tell him one thing about yourself. It doesn't have to be big or important or even relevant in the slightest, so long as it's true. Okay?"

"That's it?"

"Yeah," she says, patting my leg, "baby steps."

* * *

"Hello, Naomi," Dr. Foster says through a smile.

I sit down in the chair across from him and nod in greeting.

"How are things going thus far?"

I shrug in response.

"I see," the doctor says as he scribbles some words onto his notepad. "Harriet has informed me that you have made quite the impression on the group. In fact, she's quite pleased with your involvement."

I open my mouth to ask a question before I stop myself. There's really no point in asking a question that won't get answered or more frustratingly, answered with a bullshit response.

"Yes? Were you going to say something?"

I shake my head.

"Well," he sighs, "is there anything you'd like to tell me, or perhaps something you'd like to ask?"

I look at him and tell him very clearly, "I'd like to speak to my Mum."

Dr. Foster nods his head, "Alright, Naomi. Tell me about that?"

I look at him confused, "I just did. I want to talk to my Mum."

He smiles that annoying as fuck smile, "I apologize. I'd like you to elaborate on why you'd like to speak to your Mom."

I scoff and shake my head in response. _Fucking semantics._

"Please don't misunderstand Naomi – I'm not asking what you plan on telling your Mom or what you'd like to say to her, I'm merely asking _why_ you'd like to speak to her."

"Does that matter?"

"Naomi, you are a very clever girl. I see no point in beating about the bush. I ask you why because if you'd like to speak with your mother because you want to ask her to let you return home, I'd approach that one way. If you'd like to speak with her because you miss her, I'd approach that in an entirely different way. In any event, it gives me insight into what you're thinking or more precisely, how you are feeling."

When I don't respond, he continues, "I don't think it's any big secret that you are a tough nut to crack – pun unintended of course."

I snort. I place my hands between my knees and the chair as my fingers begin to go cold.

"Can I tell you something Naomi?" he asks not bothering for a response before continuing, "You are obviously an incredibly strong young woman. And strength is something I admire greatly. So I feel it important that you know that I respect you quite a lot."

"Are you going anywhere with this?"

"I do hope so, yes," the doctor laughs. "You see, I came into this profession so I can help people. I feel comfortable enough to share with you that it's not necessarily the easiest job, but I find a lot of fulfillment in my work. But when I see someone, like you – a young, bright girl – who is...," he pauses, "...punishing themselves, I become particularly invested. Invested, because I _know_ I can help to ease the burdens they carry... if they only allow me. Specifically, if you'd allow me."

I stare off into the bookshelf until my eyes go blurry. I blink several times until I can see clearly again, wishing life would work the same way. I sigh and readjust myself in the chair, bringing my legs up so I am sitting cross-legged. I hear Effy's words in my head, advising me to tell Foster one true thing.

"I'd like to talk to my Mum because I want to know why she broke her promise to me."

"Thank you Naomi," the doctor says, "I _very_ much appreciate you sharing that with me. When you say the promise she broke, I take it you're referring to the agreement you had to stay at Delfino's for three days?"

I nod.

Foster scratches his nose and leans back into his chair thinking. "I _would_ like to give you the chance to have that conversation with your Mum."

"What's the catch?" I ask suspiciously.

The doctor chuckles. "I suppose the 'catch' as you put it, is that you'll have to wait for the weekend. I will call your Mum and let her know I am approving visitation."

"So, I will see her? This weekend?" I ask, wanting him to confirm what he's just said.

"Yes, Naomi."

"Sweet," I say before deciding to press my luck further, "...so can I go now?"

"I think we've made some good progress today, so yes – you may leave."

He doesn't need to tell me twice as I rush out the door but not before asking him to have my Mum bring me more clothes. He assures me he will pass the message to my mother and I can't help but smile as I walk away from his office.

* * *

**Katie's POV**

I re-read Emily's note and place it back in the drawer with more force then I intend, knocking down some papers from the top of the nightstand. As I pick them up, I notice an old picture of me and Emily on holiday. She was such a killjoy on that trip. Every time some fit guy came up to us offering to buy us drinks she refused and would completely embarrass me as she dragged me away. When I confronted her about it she argued that it was supposed to be a 'sister' weekend – which apparently meant no pulling. Which was perfectly fine for her, seeing as there weren't any lezzas there, at least not any obvious ones. But there were plenty of fit blokes for me. Unfair... as per.

Speaking of unfair, being here at Delfino is un-fucking-fair. And Emily is entirely to blame for it. Dumb bitch ratted me out to Headmistress Clarke along with that cunt Presley, solidifying not only my expulsion but my admittance to Delfino House as well. I was here for a full week before she finally confessed her involvement in my departure. We were sat in the 'family lounge' during visitation when she told me. She had gotten a day pass from Headmistress Clarke and drove the fifteen miles from Grayson's to Delfino's to visit.

"_How could you do this to me?" I ask my sister through angry tears._

_Emily sighs and places her head in her hands as tears fall down her face. "I'm sorry Katie, I'm __**so**__ sorry. I didn't know what to do – how to help you. You were scaring me and I, I... I panicked."_

"_So you thought you would help by __**betraying**__ me?"_

"_No, yes.. I don't know. When Clarke called Dr. Foster he started asking me all these questions. He was saying all these things... telling me you were sick, that you needed help. I was confused, I was scared," she repeated._

"_Yeah, well thanks to you I'm here in a __**madhouse**__," I say before looking around the room._

_Emily is full on crying now. "I'll make it up to you, Katie, I promise."_

_It is in that moment that I have what I can only refer to as a stroke of genius. "Yes, Emsy, you will."_

_She sniffs and looks up at me, "What do you want me to do?" she asks quietly._

"_Behind you in the corner is the visitors' bathroom, go and get yourself cleaned up and take your backpack with you," I urged._

_She nods and follows my instructions. After waiting a couple of minutes I look about the room before making my way towards the bathroom. I knock on the door and whisper for Emily to let me in. Once inside, I take a paper towel from the receptacle, moisten it from the sink and walk over to my twin wiping the tears off her face. "It's okay, Emsy. I know you'll make it up to me," I say as I pull her into a hug. As she rests her head onto my shoulder and sobs quietly I tell her to hush and stroke her hair._

"_Do you remember when we were little and we used to play that game?"_

_She shakes her head, not removing it from my shoulder, "No, what game?"_

"_You know, Ems, __**the**__ game."_

_She takes her head off my shoulder finally and looks at me, "You mean Fitch Switch?"_

_I smile, "Yes, exactly. We were quite good at it, yeah?"_

_Emily shrugs, "Yeah, I guess – I mean we're twins, it's not __**that**__ hard."_

"_You're absolutely right – it isn't that hard."_

_She regards me suspiciously, "Why are you bringing that up? You can't want to...? I mean, you're not suggesting..."_

_I nod my head with a smile. "Why not?"_

"_Katie, we can't do that! People would know, we'd be found out!"_

"_You're underestimating our abilities. We used to do it all the time. And besides, the only two people who would be able to tell us apart are currently somewhere in the Americas. Everyone else won't notice!"_

"_So what, you want me to stay here whilst you do what exactly?"_

_I roll my eyes, "I would go back to Grayson's... __**obviously**__."_

"_No, Katie, no. __**You**__ would have to convince everyone you're __**me**__. You would have to act like me, do the things that I do. Go to the library, attend classes and -"_

"_Yeah, yeah, I know. Be a generally boring prat with the dress sense of KD Lang."_

"_You see? You can't do it. How are you going to bite your tongue and you know, __**be nice**__?" _

"_It's simple, I'll do __**whatever**__ it takes to get out of here. Emily, I can't do this – I can't be here anymore. I just need a break from this place. Next week we can switch back. I just don't think I can survive another week here. So if it takes being nice, I'll do it. If I have to act like a fucking lezza, I'll do that too."_

"_Oh god, you __**are**__ serious, aren't you?"_

After switching clothes we head back to the lounge. It is then that we finalize our plan. We spend the next couple hours exchanging information. I tell Emily about Dr. Foster and all the other residents at Delfino and my daily routine. She tells me about her classes and sheepishly admits to her budding romance with none other than Presley. She makes me promise not to interfere with any aspects of her personal life and that every decision I make has to made according to how she would choose.

And that is how I've lasted this long at Delfino House. It's fitting somehow that the person responsible for putting me here also shares the burden. With one last look at the photograph, I return it to it's place on my nightstand. Just two more days until visitation when we can switch again... just two more days.

* * *

**Naomi's POV**

"Just two more days!"

Effy looks at me with a smile. "I'm happy your meeting went so well," she says.

"How long are visiting hours anyway?" I ask.

"Just a couple hours normally. But you can gain privileges that allow for longer time, even for escorted outings with your family."

"I won't push my luck for that... I'm still shocked he's letting me see her at all."

"Hey, before I forget, try not to mention anything about visitation when Panda's around, yeah?"

"Oh, sure, no problem," I say before inquiring further, "Doesn't _anyone_ visit her?"

Effy shakes her head, "Not since I've been here."

I can't help but feel bad for the girl. My Dad fucked off and let me and my Mum ages ago and I always secretly wondered if I was somehow missing out. But I always had my Mum, always. Even when I didn't want her, she'd been there for me. I can't imagine what it would be like to be dumped here and all but forgotten. To be left in a place like this with no one to miss you at home. Fuck, to even _have_ a home. If what people have said about Pandora are true, Delfino House _is_ essentially her home. I shiver at the thought.

"You know, I think Pandora's right," I announce.

Effy looks at me with surprise, "Yeah? About what?"

"I _would_ look adorable with pigtails."

* * *

Effy and I are heading towards the Common Room after a rather uneventful Group Therapy session when I a hear a voice calling after me.

"Naomi, wait up!" Freddie calls.

We both turn around towards the boy. "Hey, Freddie, what's up?" I ask.

He moves some of his overgrown hair out of his face before responding, "Well, I was kinda hoping you would help me out?"

I look at Effy before turning back towards the boy, "Err, with what?"

"Would you sit for me? I mean, can I draw you?"

I bite my lip, "Um, you want to draw me?"

"Yeah, you see, I think, I think I've sorted the colors that I need to replicate your eyes. Took me days, but I think I've got it. But, you know, I need you as a reference. You don't really have to do anything... just kinda sit there."

"Oh, right. Well..." I feel Effy nudging me in the ribs before finishing, "fuck it, why not?"

"Excellent!" he says happily. "If you would come through this way," he says indicating the art studio to his left, "I can finish setting up. If you wanna take a seat on that stool, that would be great."

I walk over to the wooden seat and sit down. He sets up his easel with a fresh piece of canvas before adjusting the height. He pushes a rolling cart next to him containing an assortment of pencils, charcoal, oil pastels and paints. Freddie seems to be checking off a mental list as he looks at the cart before finally settling his eyes on me.

"Hmm, the light... it's not right. Mind if we move you?"

I shake my head and get up from the chair, "Where do you want me?"

"Right here by the window," he says as he drags the stool, "You should be facing the light."

I take a seat on the stool once more, "Like this?" I ask as I tilt my chin slightly.

Freddie backs away slowly before readjusting the easel. "Perfect," he mumbles.

"Well, I'm off," Effy calls from the door before leaving.

I'm a bit irritated that Effy would leave me alone with Freddie. It's not that he's a bad guy or anything, I just don't really know him and find this entire situation to be rather awkward. The bridge of my nose begins to itch and I start twitching to try and relieve it.

I hear some chuckling from behind the easel. "You _can_ move you know. I'm just sketching right now," he explains.

"Oh, right," I nod as I scratch my nose, "I've never done this before."

"What? Sit for a drawing or be in a place like Delfino?"

"Both," I offer simply.

"Yeah, you can always tell the newbies," he reveals.

"Why do people keep saying that? Is it really that obvious? What about me stands out so much?"

Freddie considers this for a moment before responding. "I suppose, it's actually part of the reason I'd like to draw you. You're different than the rest of us. You still have '_it_' in your eyes. You haven't been... broken."

I look at him quizzically.

"I don't mean you haven't experienced bad things or anything like that. I just mean, you haven't been broken from a place _like this_ yet."

"Yet?"

"I'm sorry, I should shut up," he apologizes while shaking his messy head.

"No, please don't. I want to understand what you mean."

"It's hard to explain," he says as he continues to sketch with a far off look, "It seems almost like a curse though. I know that sounds silly and perhaps that's not the right word. We're all here for different reasons, but we're all _here_," he takes a breath before continuing, "and somehow we all find ourselves _back_ here."

I don't know how to respond to that, so I don't. Several minutes pass before he drops his pencil on the ground.

"A game!" he announces. "It's like a fucking _game_. We go around the board, we pass 'Go', collect our money, just to lose it again. And then we can't stop. We keep on playing. We keep taking turns and we go around and around and fucking around. And the thing we all have in common? The knowledge that we don't make the rules. You know why," he asks not waiting for a response before continuing. "Because we're all playing someone else's game."

* * *

Freddie's words haunt me. They continue to play in my mind and I can't help but wonder if he's right. I look about the room and look at the faces of the people here. Some sad, some feigning something intending to pass as happiness, most are just... tired looking. And that's when I see it. What Freddie was describing... that brokenness. I close my eyes in realization, it's hopelessness. These people don't have hope... _do_ _I_?

I never thought about it before. I mean, I guess I was too busy living, you know? Just doing the day to day stuff not ever stopping to wonder... not until that night. That _fucking_ night. I feel like a million little marching men are moving from behind my eyes and tunneling themselves into my skull.

It's the reason I couldn't sleep, why I couldn't function, why my brain wouldn't shut down. It's because I was questioning everything. Wondering if it was all worth it. Wondering if _I_ was worth it. Wondering why _I_ was somehow worth more than the lives of two others. I shake my head and scream, "No!"

* * *

**Effy's POV**

After leaving Freddie and Naomi in the art studio I make my way to the dining room where I find Panda talking to Thomas.

"Alright, Thomas?" I inquire.

I am met with a bright smile. The kind of smile you don't find too often behind these walls. "Yes, I am most well, and you Effy?"

I nod at the boy in reply.

"Effy, guess what? Thommo gave us these," she says holding up a couple bags of sweets, "for the film tonight. It's gonna be loads of fun, yeah?"

"It sure is Panda," I say, motioning for us to leave.

Pandora turns back to Thomas smiling cheerfully, "Thanks Thommo, you're the best!"

We begin to walk back to the Common Room, Pandora skipping along beside me with her usual ramblings and stopping periodically to greet our fellow inmates. Far more accurate than 'residents' if you ask me.

We claim our usual spot in the CR on the most comfortable couch. I take my ever present deck of cards from my pocket and begin to deal them out onto the table in front of us to begin Panda's favorite card game.

"What are you lovely ladies playing? A little five card stud?" Cook asks with interest as he sits in a large chair across from us. "Count me in!"

"Don't be silly Cookie, there aren't even five studs here. There's you, Freddie, JJ," she says counting each boy on a finger, "and that's it really. 'Course I'm not counting the folks in the adults unit... _nothing_ studly about them, right Eff?"

"Quite right Panda," I smirk.

"See?"

Cook looks between us both with a big smile. "Man, I love you Panda-pops. You're ace, yeah?"

Pandora scrunches her face. "Yeah, I am. But I won't do surf and turf with you Cook," she says matter of factly.

Let it be known that Pandora Moon is amazing. I pat her shoulder and smile at the boy sat across from us with a rather confused look on his face. "_Yeah, Cook_. Panda's just not interested. I'm afraid you'll have to look elsewhere for... surf and turf."

Cook catches my eyes and winks before responding, "Well, I gotta say I'm disappointed," he says touching his heart, "but I appreciate your honesty."

"Don't worry Cookie, you'll find someone!" Pandora chirps happily.

Cook nods his head in agreement before rubbing his hands together. "Alright, so what are we playing then?"

"You're going to love it!" beams Panda, "It's a wicked cool game called 'Go Fish!'"

* * *

After a few rounds of the card game, Josie comes into the Common Room and announces the options for tonight's film. After everyone votes, and a few tantrums are thrown, a movie is selected and a large screen is brought into the room.

Pandora motions for me to sit below her on the couch so she can braid my hair whilst we watch the movie. I settle beneath her, opening a bag of hard candies and passing them to her. From the corner of my eye I see Naomi walking into the room looking rather unsettled. I whistle in her direction and her eyes meet mine as she walks towards us.

"Alright, Naoms?"

She settles next to me, resting her back onto the bottom of the coach, tucking her legs under her. "Huh? Yeah." She has a dazed abd far off look to her. I can practically _hear_ the whirring in her mind.

People think I'm all knowing – I'm not, obviously. If I were would I really be here? Not likely. I am however, observant. No, perceptive. See, people release all sorts of energy or vibes, if you prefer. I'm good at picking up on them, I'm good at reading people and in particular their motivations. I suppose it's why I'm a good judge of character. It's how I know that Naomi's good – that she's special.

I position myself a little closer to her, forcing Pandora to also scoot over on the couch above us. Naomi doesn't notice. She's looking around the room in confusion. Staring at all the people gathered to watch the film. I see her hold her face in her hands and I touch her shoulder gently. When she doesn't respond I know she's too far gone now. I start rubbing her back in the hopes it will bring her out of her head but it doesn't work. I bring my face close to hers and begin whispering in her ear.

"Naomi, you're okay. You're safe. Just breathe and feel my hands on you, okay? Focus on my touch."

But everything is so very _not okay_ and I know it. And then, she screams. I look around the room, hoping that the movie has drowned out her call. I shake my head from Panda's grasp as she notices for the first time Naomi's struggle.

Pandora's eyes widen in fear. "What do we do, Eff?" she whispers worriedly.

Naomi's a strong girl, but she's been holding everything in for far too long. Like a kettle on a stove – at some point it's going to blow.

She starts to convulse and scream. She begins shaking her head from side to side. "God, no, please don't!" she shrieks.

_Whooooooot!_ There goes the whistle.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Poor, Naomi. I feel for her, I really do. And I'm sure she would have looked adorable in pigtails too! Maybe next time Panda!**

**Thank you so much for all the reviews, faves and follows! They make me feel like a princess. *twirls***

**For those American readers, I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving! I hope you get to spend time with the people you love all whilst stuffing your faces - after all, it IS the American way! :p**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	6. Something Different

**A/N:**

**So nearly 30k words with no Noamily in a Naomily fic? Yeah. It's a disgrace, I know. The remedy of which may or may not be found below...**

**Longest chapter to date, so put on your ugly fuzzy socks that I know you all have and get comfy!**

* * *

**Emily's POV**

"As we've discussed, the rules for today are simple; I only ask that you be direct and honest. As you've all agreed to do just that, let's begin."

Dr. Foster flips open a leather bound notebook and uncaps a pen. He smiles at each of us. "Katie has been at Delfino House four weeks. In that time we've discussed her Borderline Personality Disorder and how it affects her life – but today, I would like to discuss how it affects her relationships." He looks from my Mum to my Dad, then James and me, before stopping at Katie with an encouraging smile. "Katie, can you share with your family how you feel about your diagnosis?"

I reach over and take her hand, giving it a squeeze followed by a smile. She smiles back before responding. "I think it's shit," she says with a lisp.

"Honestly Katie, you'd think you were raised by savages with the way you talk." Jenna admonishes.

"That's quite alright, Mrs. Fitch. This is a place for open and honest communication. And she's right, it is shit. Would any of _you_ like BPD?" he asks rhetorically. He gestures for Katie to continue, "Can you expand on that?"

"It's just... can you tell _them_ it's not my fault?" she asks Dr. Foster ignoring our mother's scoffs.

"Of course, it's not your fault. The cause for BPD is unknown. What we _do_ know is that genetics, brain abnormalities and childhood trauma may factor in – but no definite source is known. This isn't something you asked for. And certainly your family doesn't blame you for it," he says looking up at everyone for confirmation. My Dad and I readily agree with nods and affirming words.

"I didn't know being a slutty bitch made you mental," James shrugs returning to his handheld game. I elbow him painfully in the ribs. "Oi! What'd ya do that for?" he yells while clutching his side.

"Don't talk about your sister like that," my Dad says through clenched teeth before threatening, "I don't care where we are, I _will_ set up the naughty bar."

My brother scowls in response, muttering under his breath.

The doctor watches the interactions play out before him with great interest. "Right. Well, I think we're all in agreement that Katie having BPD is not her fault. Moving on, I'd like for each of you to tell Katie how her behavior and choices make you feel. Mr. Fitch, would you like to begin?"

"Oh? Sure, yeah," he mutters nervously before looking at Katie with a bright smile, "My beautiful Katiekins, such a little spitfire you are. I love that about you... you don't take shit from no one," his smile falter before he continues, "I just worry about your future. I want you to be happy, have a family. But sometimes you do things and I... I get scared. I worry you'll put yourself in a dangerous situation. You're not invincible Katie," he finishes softly.

Foster turns to my sister. "Katie, can you repeat to me what you just heard your Dad say?".

My sister rolls her eyes. "He's scared and worried," she says simply.

Dr. Foster nods before writing additional notes in his book. "James would you like to go next?"

James raises his eyes from his game. "Uh, like I said she's a bi-... mean person. Gordon MacPherson says that when girls get cranky you just need to give 'em one. 'Course you're the doctor so _you_ should probably sort her."

"Shall I tell you what I just heard, Dr. Foster?" Katie asks sweetly, "I just heard what a dirty, little bastard my brother is."

"Katie, focus on how you _feel_ about what James just said."

"I _feel_ like sticking my shoe so far up his-"

"Perhaps James, should wait outside," my Dad interrupts as he pulls James up by his sleeve and pushes him out the door, returning with a homicidal looking smile.

"Moving on," the doctor says with wide eyes, "Emily, how about you?"

_Shit_. I haven't really thought about what my answer will be. I don't want to make things worse than I already have.

"Emily, perhaps you can tell Katie what you told me at Grayson's?"

I can't help but cringe at the reminder of my betrayal. "Um... I don't recall really," I answer lamely.

"Emily, you've agreed to be honest," Foster scolds gently. "You're not doing yourself any favors by not speaking up. Katie _needs_ to hear how you feel about her behavior. If you can't be honest for yourself, then perhaps you can be honest for her."

I look over at Katie silently seeking permission. She shrugs ever so slightly. I take a breath before I begin. "Like my Dad, I worry for Katie as well. Her behavior is reckless and harmful – not just to herself but to others as well. I suppose lately I've realized just how destructive it is and I worry for the people she hurts," I stop then wondering how Katie will respond.

Whilst her face is impassive, her jaw is clenched and I hope I haven't gone too far. The truth is there is a lot more I would like to tell her. Things I _need_ to tell her but I'll never say.

"Emily, I thank you for your honesty," the doctor says before turning to Katie, "Can you tell me what you heard your sister say?"

"That she worries too – for me and _others,_" she says the last word with disgust.

"Very good.," Foster says as he nods. "Mrs. Fitch, I believe it's your turn. How does Katie's behavior and choices make you feel?"

My mother looks at the doctor with cold and steely eyes. She is silent and unmoving. "Jenna?" my Dad asks while rubbing her shoulder, "Go on, love."

"No," my mother says with certainty, "I don't think I will. I've had just about enough of all this nonsense. For goodness sakes look at _where we are_, Rob," she says with the same look of disgust her daughter expressed just moments ago. "This is all ridiculous. You want honesty, doctor? I'll give you honesty. Katie is _selfish_. She's controlling, possessive and manipulative. And you know what else she is? _Your_ problem," she finishes before grabbing her purse and heading for the door.

I stand up from my chair in and shout at her,"Mum!" She turns around, before arching an eyebrow at me questioning my gall. "How can you say that? You're her _mother_!"

She walks slowly but deliberately towards me. "You're questioning me as a mother, Emily? You're a child, you have no idea what it's like to be a parent – to _want_ for your child. How can you possibly question me? I've given you children everything. I've sacrificed for all of you. And do you know what I get for all my efforts? A psychopath, a pervert and a _lesbian,_" her mouth scrunches up as she says the last word and stalks out the room.

* * *

As we switch clothes in the lounge's restroom, Katie and I pretend we don't notice the tears falling freely from both of our faces. Once we've finished dressing and have cleaned up a bit, we finally turn to each other.

"Katie, she didn't mean any of it..." I say softly.

She snorts, "Of course she did Emily."

I wrap my arms around her waist and she allows me to hold her. After a brief moment, she sniffles and pushes me away from her. She walks towards the mirror, "Anything I need to know?" she asks.

I shake my head as I pull the folded letter out of my pocket. "Not really. It's all in my note though," I say as I hand her the paper. She accepts it, placing it in her bra.

After fluffing up her hair one final time, Katie leans back against the wall. "My note is in the normal place."

I lean against the door adjacent her. "Anything interesting happen since last week? How was the new girl? She's nice isn't she?"

"God, you are _so_ transparent, Emily. What _is_ it with you and blondes?"

"Fuck off! She seemed nice is all."

"Yeah, well how would your _precious _Presley feel about you and "nice" Naomi?"

I roll my eyes in response, shaking my head. "You know, just cause I'm gay it doesn't mean I lust after every girl I meet."

"I know," she smiles, "...just the blonde ones."

I go to smack her arm, but she dodges the blow and smiles triumphantly. I can't be angry at her when she acts like this. Playful and lovely. I move to stand next to her and bump my right shoulder into her left. We stand together quietly for a moment.

"Actually, Naomi's kind of interesting," Katie says breaking the silence.

"Yeah?" I ask. "In what way?"

She considers my question before responding, "I thought she was different. I mean, different from the rest of the people here. And she _was_... for a bit."

"For a bit? What happened?"

"I dunno," she shrugs. "Had some sort of fit or breakdown or some shit," she says dismissively.

"Oh," I say, surprised by the news.

"Actually, I tried to check up on her and -" Katie stops at my raised eyebrows. "What?" she asks.

"_You_? You checked up on her? Why?" I ask in shock.

She rolls her eyes. "I was _curious_. Besides, I loaned her a magazine and wanted it back."

"And what happened?"

Katie shrugs, "She was just laying in bed. I tried to talk to her, but she just laid there. I don't think she's moved since it happened."

I can't imagine the girl I met a week ago having some sort of fit. She seemed so together and _normal_. "Well, that's sad," I say finally.

"Yeah, there goes the possibility of having any intelligent conversation in this place."

"_Katie_!"

* * *

After our goodbyes, I return to my room (for the week) and retrieve Katie's note from behind the nightstand.

_Emily,_

_Just keep to our room or the library, yeah? Group therapy sessions too, obviously. Seriously, I don't see the point in them really. How does it help __me__ to hear other people's problems? It doesn't._

_Hmm, what else? Oh, that blonde you wanna shag? She's a total bitch... but she's kinda alright too. I don't know. You told me to try to make friends (which in all honesty, is pretty fucking laughable. I mean __you__ telling __me__ to make friends? Ha!) so I tried or whatever. Even gave her a mud mask treatment. Of course she needs a bit more help than that, but she's stubborn and I don't have the patience to deal with her for any longer than 30 minute increments. And let's face it, 30 minutes isn't enough to sort her. _

_I suppose if you wanna talk to her you can. But you need to promise not to pull any lezzer moves on her. I __do not__ want to come back to a blonde lusting after me. Not that I can blame her. I __do__ have amazing tits._

_This week in my sessions with Foster we discussed how my behaviors affect other people. I'm supposed to reflect on that. We were given "homework" in Group and are supposed to come up with an example of when we have felt disappointed with someone we love and be prepared to share it. The best I could come up with was when Louis Vuitton released those awful fur boots in his Fall Collection a couple seasons back. Perhaps you can come up with something else? I'll leave it to you._

_Just one more thing. Pandora was put into the QR earlier in the week. I might have said something that she took completely the wrong way. And well, you __know__ how sensitive she is. Effy seems to think that it was my fault – her ending up in there. I swear Pandora is like Effy's little pet or something. Anyway, it's not a big deal or anything, but just thought I'd tell you in case it was mentioned by anyone else._

_XX, Katie_

Further down on the paper I saw an arrow indicating to turn the page over.

_Update__! So you're gonna have to nix any ideas of chatting Naomi up. She had some sort of breakdown and is completely out of it. I'm actually quite surprised they didn't put her in the QR. Anyway, it's probably for the best... I'm not sure you can be trusted with blondes anyhow._

_XX, Katie_

* * *

I sit on the bed drumming my fingers against the magazine in my lap. Katie's right about on thing. She's always going on about how boring this place is and she isn't wrong. It's bad when you look forward to therapy sessions just to break up the monotony. I place the magazine on the nightstand and get up from the bed. I decide to go to the library. Perhaps, I'll even pick up some tea from the dining hall as well.

After selecting several books from the library and grabbing a large cup of tea I make my way back to my room. Several doors down from my own, I see Effy looking back into Naomi's room with furrowed brows. As if sensing someone looking at her, she turns to me and meets my gaze. I begin to walk towards her and am met halfway by the brunette before she places herself casually against the wall.

"Katie," she deadpans.

Preparing my best Katie impression, I straighten my back, raising my head slightly. "So? How is she then?"

Effy looks back to room she previously departed and shakes her head in response. She eyes me suspiciously before regarding me with a threatening stance. "Leave her alone, Katie."

I roll my eyes. "Well I'm hardly going to attack her or anything, am I?"

"Like you _didn't_ attack Panda?"

My face falls slightly before I catch myself. "Don't be so dramatic Effy. It doesn't suit you," I retort, summoning Katie-like confidence.

She pushes herself off the wall to tower above me. "I'll be back to check on her in a few," She then looks down at the books in my hands and smirks as she walks away. "Interesting choices, Katiekins, very interesting..."

After watching Effy turn towards the main corridor, I make my way towards the blonde's room. I bite my lip before peaking into the quiet room. Naomi is curled into the fetal position in her bed with glazed over eyes. Oh God, she looks so... broken. I find myself walking into the room. A chair has been moved and positioned next to her bed, presumably by Effy. I sit down slowly and place my books and tea on her nightstand.

I smile hesitantly. "Hi."

Naomi doesn't respond in any way. She doesn't even blink.

I stare at her, unsure of what to do. She looks so small, so fragile. There's no resemblance to the girl I met briefly last week. The beautiful blonde with cool blue eyes has been replaced by the empty shell in front of me. I find myself standing up. I can't look at her anymore – not like this. I don't know why seeing her this way affects me so much, but it does. I begin to pace the room. I close my eyes taking a deep, calming breath, exhaling slowly. When I open them, I'm stood in front of her dresser. I nod my head in confirmation of my thoughts before opening a drawer and removing a blanket from inside.

I walk over to the broken blonde and place the blanket gently onto her, pulling it up until it reaches her chin. I move my hand to the base of her neck and pull out the hair from beneath the blanket. It's soft – like really soft. I find myself rubbing the ends of her hair before I shake my head, catching myself. _Jesus, Emily. Stop it._

I plop myself down onto the chair in front of her bed and retrieve the cup of tea from the nightstand taking a large sip. My eyes never leaving the blonde. _Now what?_

"You know if you just wanted attention, there _are_ better ways."

No response.

"Effy's been in to see you. Says you're unwell."

She continues to stare off into space.

"She actually threatened me. Doesn't want me messing with you. Am I really _that_ bad?"

I take another sip from my tea. "Probably best that you're not talking right now. I'm not sure I want you to answer that."

"You can hear me though, yeah? Did they drug you up? Probably. Perhaps you're just sleeping with your eyes open? God, that's creepy..."

"Fish sleep with their eyes open," I continue. "Course they don't have eyelids, but yeah..." I take another sip. "They're a bit weird, aren't they? Fish, I mean."

Still no response.

"I'm going to assume that you can't hear me. I mean otherwise, how could you _possibly_ resist contributing to this positively stimulating conversation?"

I sigh when there is no visible change in the blonde. I take another sip of my tea, still looking at Naomi. "You must be starving. Want me to get something for you? At least have some tea? How do you take it?"

My question goes unanswered. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at the lack of a response but I can't help but feel disappointed. _Say something._

I get up from the chair and kneel in front of her. I raise the mug of tea to her face like an offering to a god. "Go on then," I encourage. "You need something in your system."

I lean back on my heels before returning to my chair with a defeated sigh. After several more minutes of silence I get up from my chair and begin to pace the room again. _God, she's frustrating!_

"Come on, Naomi," I say beginning to get angry. "Say something... _anything_! Tell me to fuck off or-"

I stop my pacing and look at the bed. I hear the blanket moving and see her slightly shift positions on the bed.

"So you _can_ hear me?" I say placing a hand on my hip. "Do you want me to go?" I ask quietly. _Please say no, please say no. Tell me you want me to stay._

When I am again met without response I huff in frustration and turn as if to leave the room.

"Ems," Naomi croaks.

I turn around with shock. "Wh-what?" I stutter. _How does she know? _I slowly return to the chair looking at her in disbelief. "Naomi?"

Her eyes slowly move to meet mine. "Ems," she croaks again. She swallows hard before trying again. "Ems."

I reach for the cup of tea and place it against her lips, tipping the cup backwards. "Easy," I say as she begins to sip greedily. I move the cup away from her face in warning. "Slowly, okay?" She nods. I return the mug to her lips and she takes another large gulp. When I think she's had enough I return it to the nightstand and look at her expectantly.

"Ems... who is she?" the blonde asks.

_Oh. She doesn't know who I am._ "How do you know about her?" I ask shaking my head in confusion.

"The letter – the one you dropped the other day. It said 'love, Ems' on it. Who is she? Your girlfriend?" She says all this through a hoarse voice which obviously hasn't been used in days.

I snort. I can't help it. _Katie? With a girlfriend? Ha! _"No, no. It's nothing like that. She's my sister."

She scrunches her eyebrows in the most adorable way. "Didn't know you had a sister," she says quietly. "That must be nice."

"Yeah, I suppose I don't talk much about her, do I? She's my twin actually."

She regards me with undisguised shock. "What?" I ask.

"I'm just trying to imagine two of you is all," she confesses.

"Yeah, well we're not terribly alike... I mean, sure we look alike, but that's where the similarities end I'm afraid."

"Why? What's Ems like?"

I can't help but smile when she says my nickname. It sounds like music coming from her. "She's just different. Quieter and..."

"_Quieter_?" Naomi interrupts. "So she's like Katie 2.0 then?" she jokes.

I laugh. "Actually, I was going to say _gayer_."

I look at her response with great interest. She blinks and nods once. "Oh." There is a slightly longer than appropriate pause that makes me regret revealing this information to a girl I hardly know.

"So she _is_ Katie 2.0 then," she says smirking.

I can't help but smile brightly at her reaction before remembering that I'm meant to be Katie right now. "Oi! I shout as I gently punch her shoulder.

"Jesus, Katie," Naomi protests as she rubs her shoulder. "that hurt."

"Really? Sorry, I didn't mean to..." I apologize as I reach over to rub her arm.

She looks at me quizzically. "It's alright," she says as she begins to pull herself off the bed. Once her legs touch the ground and she stands, her hands move to her head and she groans. She takes a wobbly step forward. I find myself reaching out to stabilize her, my hands clasped firmly around her waist.

"Take it _easy_, Naomi. Why don't you get back in bed?," I encourage as I gently maneuver her backwards towards the bed. Once her knees connect with the mattress, I push against her shoulders encouraging her to rest against the headboard of the bed in a sitting position. "You can't just get up right away. You've been in bed for days."

She pulls her legs into her chest and wraps her arms around them. "I's'pose." She closes her eyes tightly and begins to rub her temples.

"Does your head hurt?" I ask as I plant myself on the bed with her.

"Mm-hmm," she hums.

"How about I get you something to eat? You'll feel better with something in your stomach."

She shrugs. "I'm not really hungry."

"Well, unless you want them to force feed you, you're going to have to eat something."

She shakes her head. I sigh. _God, she's stubborn._

"Did they give you anything?"

She moves her head to look up at me. "What do you mean?"

"Did they give you any meds?"

Her eyes move down as she cocks her head to the side, clearly thinking. "I don't know... I don't remember." She considers this for a moment before a slight panic reaches her eyes. "Is that weird? I mean is that normal? I...I was going to the CR and I...," she doesn't finish.

I pat her knee. "It's okay. They probably gave you a sedative."

"Oh," she says simply. "What day is it?"

I smile gently, "It's Saturday. You've been out of it for a couple of days." She doesn't react and I fear that she's back to the unresponsive shell that I encountered earlier. "Effy's been around. I'm sure Pandora has too," I say. "Do you recall them stopping by?"

"No."

"Do you want me to go and get the-"

"Your voice," she says in a way that sounds like a question.

"Um, yes? My voice? What about it?"

"That's the first thing I can recall being aware of. Your voice. It's different."

I bite my lip. _Shit._

She releases her legs from her arms, crossing them as she sits upright and eyes me curiously. "_You're_ different."

It sounds like an accusation. _Fuck_. Naomi eyes me up and down searching for answers. Answers I can't give her. _Jesus, Emily get your shit together._

"What changed?" she asks.

"Nothing's changed," I answer quickly.

She shakes her head. "No," she says with conviction. "You're lying. You _are_ different."

_Fucking hell. She knows. She fucking knows. I need to get a handle on this and quickly. Think, Emily, think!_

"I can tell when people are lying – and you, Katie – _you're lying_. Something's not right."

"Fuck sakes, Naomi! I try to be fucking... _charitable_, what with you going completely mental and now you're accusing _me_ of shit I've no idea of! The only thing 'not right,'" I hiss, "is _you_." I storm out the door with every ounce of Katie's special brand of bitch that I can muster.

* * *

I can't believe I said such horrible things to her. How could I be so cruel? She didn't deserve it. Not because she's clearly going through some emotional upset, but because she's a good person. I don't even know her and I can already see that about her.

Naomi's right of course. There _is_ something different about me. I _am_ lying. I _am_ hiding something. God, why does she have to be so clever? Katie and I have been switching for weeks without any suspicion at all. Why now? Oh, I know. Because I couldn't have just fucking gone back into my room with my books and tea. No. I had to go and satiate my curiosity about the gorgeous blonde. Yeah, I admit it, she's beautiful. _Jesus, Emily!_ If Katie can fucking pretend to be you, surely you can pretend to be her? Get it together. I just need to keep my head down and everything will be okay.

There's just one slight problem. I don't think I _can_ stay away from her.

And I don't think I want to. _Fuuuuck_.

* * *

I am putting on a jumper and getting ready to head to the dining hall when I hear someone clear their throat. Effy is stood in my room with her ever present smirk.

"I'm not in the mood Effy," I say with annoyance.

She walks over to the bed opposite mine and sits down without invitation. I roll my eyes and ignore her as I take the hair band from my wrist and pull my hair up into a messy bun. "If you're here to threaten me some more about Naomi, there's really no point," I say as I pull out some hair to frame my face. "She's _your_ friend, not mine. And I could really care less about the daily dramas of Delfino House."

"Guess you don't want her letter then," Effy says smugly.

I narrow my eyes at her. "What letter?"

"This one," she says, flapping the paper up and down in front of my face.

My hand reaches out to grab it, but she's quicker and she steps back, taking the note with her.

"I recall telling you to leave Naomi alone. It seems you didn't do that, Katiekins, did you?"

I cross my arms over my chest. "Yeah? So?"

She smirks as she holds the letter out to me once more. "Well, I'm glad you didn't listen to me," she says.

I take the paper from her. "What does it say?"

She shrugs. "Dunno. Not my place to read it. She just asked me to pass it along to you."

I look at her sceptically as she walks out the room. "See ya at Group, Katie," she says cheerfully.

Sitting down on the bed, I unfold the note.

_Katie,_

_I'm a tit. I shouldn't have accused you of anything. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what I was even accusing you of. I was just confused I guess. But I stand by my earlier statement; you do seem different. __Not__ in a bad way though. _

_I guess I just want to apologize. Effy told me that I was completely unresponsive for days. I don't know how or why I snapped out of it when I did, but somehow I think you're to thank for it. So, thank you._

_Naomi_

_P.S. Is Ems single? ;)_

A grin spreads across my face from ear to ear.

* * *

I grab a sandwich and a packaged juice cup from the dining hall and make my way back to my room. Before I've entered, I feel a hand wrap around my arm, spinning me around.

"Come on," Effy says as she releases my arm, "Group starts in ten."

"Exactly," I say holding up my food, "I still have time, yeah?"

"Not if you want to talk to Naomi before hand..." she replies with a smirk.

"She's going? I would have thought she'd skip today's session..."

"Yes, well – she's not," she says somewhat impatiently. "So... are you coming then?"

I shrug and begin to walk towards the common room. "Why'd you come and get me?" I ask not looking at her.

Effy's pace soon reaches my own. "Because Naomi asked me if I thought you were coming and I told her I'd find out."

"_Pfft_! How does you _dragging_ me across the corridor constitute as 'finding out'?"

She reaches her arm out to her side, effectively stopping my progress. "I think we both know, that I'm hardly dragging you anywhere."

I look down at her arm and then her face with a pointed look then swat it away and continue walking. "I really don't know what you're talking about – and clearly neither do you."

"Whatever you say Katiekins," she says chuckling.

* * *

Once we reach the common room, I see Naomi curled on the couch that Effy and her crew usually occupy. When I approach I take a seat next to her and hear Pandora summarizing the film she missed the other night. Upon seeing me, she smiles tentatively. Almost as if to ask 'are we okay?' I share a small smile before opening my juice cup and bringing it to my lips. Effy walks to the chair that Panda's sat upon and whispers something into her ear. A moment later Pandora stands up with Effy and announces that they have to set up the group room. From the corner of my eye I swear I see Effy wink at Naomi.

When I turn to look at the blonde, she is shaking her head with a smile.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing. Effy's just being-"

"A twat?" I finish.

She laughs, "Something like that, yeah."

I can't stop looking at her... her eyes, her hair, her face. This is getting to be ridiculous! So I focus on unwrapping my sandwich. When I've completed my task, I open my mouth to take a bite and at the same time, our eyes connect. We look at each other silently for several seconds when I see her eyes move to my still open mouth. I quickly close it and her eyes move to her hands as she begins to pick at her nails. And then there's just silence.

"Haveyoueatenyet?" I stumble.

She shakes her head, "I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that?"

_Very smooth, Emily._ "Have you eaten yet?" I try again.

"Huh? Oh, no," she says, "still not hungry."

I sigh. "That's really not a good enough reason," I say as I hold out half of my sandwich to her. "Go on," I encourage, "it's not poisoned." I take a much too large bite as proof. "See?" I say with my mouth full of food.

She raises her hands to her face and covers her mouth with her long fingers, attempting to hide her laugh. I finish chewing the food and take a large sip of juice. When I look back at the blonde she releases her laugh. "Were you raised in a barn or something? Jesus..."

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, yeah stop stalling, okay?" and I point to the sandwich in her hand with my best bossy voice.

"Alright, alright," she says before taking a bite. Once she's finished chewing I offer her the juice which she accepts. "Thanks."

"Sure," I shrug.

"So, did you... um, get my note?"

"Yeah, um, I wrote you back," I say shyly as I retrieve a note of my own and hand it to her.

She looks at the letter and I swear I catch a hint of a smile cross her face. "Cool," she nods, placing it in the pocket of her jumper.

* * *

"Alright kids, I gave you each an assignment – I asked you to think about a time when you've felt disappointed by someone you love. Who would like to begin?" Harriet looks around the room. "Come on guys, surely you've all felt disappointed a time or two?" When it's clear that no one has any intention of contributing she allows her frustration to show.

"At this point all of you are aware of how things work here, yes? If you are not _actively_ participating in your individualized treatment plan, you are in fact undermining the program. And when that happens... who can tell me? Elizabeth?"

Everyone shuffles uncomfortably in their seats avoiding Effy. The girl in question blinks before responding in a monotone voice as if reading directly from a Delfino House pamphlet. "When a resident is found to be hindering the progress of their treatment plan, a new plan is put in place."

"Yes and why is that?" the woman asks.

Effy crosses her legs gracefully. "Because the initial plan wasn't working. Obviously."

Harriet nods. "_Or_ the resident wasn't working the program like _she_ should have," she retorts whilst giving Effy a pointed look.

"Right," is all that Effy says in response.

"Now that we've all been reminded of how important it is to contribute, who would like to start?"

She looks around the room with raised eyebrows before she settles her gaze on Naomi. _Oh great, this is hardly what Naomi needs right now. _The blonde scratches her nose and looks towards Effy, seemingly for advice or perhaps assurance.

"Harriet?" I ask, drawing the attention to myself. "I'll begin."

"Well thank you, Katie. I'd like that very much," she looks at me in shock and gestures for me to continue.

I lick my lips before taking a breath. "Um, my mum. She's..." I pause trying to come up with a word to describe her. "Well, she's..." I shake my head.

"Perhaps, Katie needs a bit of encouragement to continue?" Harriet says looking at the group expectantly.

"It's okay, Katiekins," Pandora says brightly. "you can tell us anything. We're all in this together, yeah?"

Effy looks at her friend and smiles before regarding me. "Go on then, Katiekins."

I sigh and continue. "She doesn't know how to love – not properly anyway," as I say the words I nod my head finally admitting what I've always known. "It's like the only love she knows how to give comes with conditions."

Harriet leans into her lap, putting her hand under her chin. "That must be very difficult – feeling that her love isn't unconditional. How does it affect you?"

"I... well, I suppose for a long time I tried to live within her conditions – tried to be who she wanted me to be..." I trail off.

"But?" Freddie asks. When all eyes look at him he shakes his head and apologizes. "Sorry, it just seemed like there was a 'but' in there?"

I nod. "_But_ I couldn't be the person she wanted. And...," I shrug. "...and _she_ couldn't love me any other way." I can feel everyone's eyes on me and I don't think I've ever felt quite so exposed before. It's scary as hell and I hate it. But there's another feeling too. I feel raw? Like a scab on your arm after it is scraped away, leaving newly formed raw, pink skin. And it kinda feels good.

"So how does that affect me?" I ask myself. I look Harriet directly in the eyes. "It terrifies me. It makes me scared that maybe there is something wrong with me – or that I'm just not worthy of her love."

"That's bollocks."

I look at Naomi, who seems just as surprised at her own words than I am. Harriet nods towards the blonde, "I quite agree with the sentiment, Naomi. Can you elaborate on that?"

"Uh, well... Katie began by saying that her mum doesn't know how to love properly. And then she goes on to say-" she is interrupted by Harriet.

"Naomi, would you mind addressing Katie?"

"Oh, right," she says and looks at me with concentrated eyes. "You say she doesn't know how to love properly, right? Well that's _her_ issue, not yours. Why should you have to change and be a different person in order for her to love you? It's bollocks. A parent shouldn't do that – shouldn't use the threat of their love as a tool to manipulate you into being different. It's not right."

I am utterly flabbergasted by the sincerity and conviction not only in her words but also in Naomi's eyes. Around the room all eyes are focused on her with looks of downright astonishment to something resembling respect from Effy.

"Thank you for sharing your thoughts Naomi." Harriet nods before turning to me. "Katie, do you have anything you'd like to add?"

I finally take my eyes away from Naomi and shake my head. "No, I think that's about it."

* * *

When we are released from our Group session, Naomi is pulled aside by Harriet and asked to stay behind. I force myself not to turn around and look at her. I focus on taking firm solid steps away from the girl that has me so on edge.

As I take off my shoes to get into bed, I notice the rolled paper tucked into my sock. It's a picture of me and Presley on a recent outing to the little town by Grayson's. I had rolled up the photograph and put it in my sock so I could have something that reminded me of 'home,' because that's what Grayson has started to feel like. It's funny though, I haven't thought much of my school or Presley today.

I wonder what Katie's doing right now. The note I gave her included a not so gentle reminder for Katie not to muck things up with Presley. Things were going well – really well actually. Of course we hadn't made things official or anything, but we might as well have. Presley was great – clever, pretty and back to being popular too. If anything Katie's treatment of Presley made her even more popular than before. I suppose that's actually one of the problems as of late. Presley's scared that if we make things official and well, 'out there' – pun intended – then she'd lose her queen bee status. I don't want to force her to do anything that she's not ready to do, so I'll wait. She's worth it.

Thinking about my girlfriend/not girlfriend makes me feel rather guilty. Keeping this big secret from her can't be a good start to a relationship. I wonder how Presley would react if I told her about the Fitch Switch. It hasn't been easy, but she seems to have simmered down on the whole Katie front. Of course, I don't think she's totally forgiven her, but I think she feels differently knowing that Katie's getting treatment.

I look down at the picture of us outside a cafe squeezed onto a small bench. She has an arm around my neck and I have one around her waist, the other hand taking the picture. I think we look nice together. I feel a prick from my pocket and pull out Naomi's note. I wonder what I would look like with a _different_ blonde... _fuck, Emily, stop it! _I mean she might not even be gay... although her post script in the letter kinda infers she is, right? Not that her being gay would make a difference. I _am_ seeing someone after all. Kind of. I think back to my reply to her question. I probably shouldn't have said I was single, but it's true isn't it? Presley and I are... in transition? Yes, I like that. We're transitioning between friends and more than friends. Of course, if it were up to me there would be no need for this transition phase at all – but I'm being _supportive_, I remind myself. That's me, Emily, always doing the right thing...

I unfurl the edges of the picture just as Naomi walks in.

"Hey," she says. "Whatcha up to?"

I move my hand to cover the picture, but her eyes follow my motions. "Nothing really, you?" I ask, hoping to distract her.

She sits on the bed next to me and sighs. I can feel her thigh lightly bump against mine until she brings both her legs up onto the bed and crosses them. "Just waiting for dinner to finish."

"Oh, so you've decided to start eating again, have you?"

"Well, I don't have much of a choice really. It appears Panda has arranged for one of my favorite meals to be served, so..."

"I didn't realize she had connections like that." I state, clearly impressed.

"Yes, well, you would know that if you stopped being such a cunt."

I kick her in the shins, "Oi, I resent that!"

"Jesus, Katie! Has anyone ever told you how violent you are?" she says rubbing her leg.

"Don't be such a baby, I didn't kick you that hard!"

"I don't think you know your own strength," she say emphatically. "Surprising really, based on how small you are."

I roll my eyes at her. "Did you just come down her to take the piss?"

"No, that's just an added bonus," she smiles before beginning again. "Actually, I came down here to thank you for your note."

"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about, Naomi."

"Oh, right. Sorry," she says feigning contrition. "But if you _had_, you know – written me a note – and you _had_ asked me a question? Well, the answer would be yes."

I look down to hide my smile. "_Hypothetically_, you mean," I say with raised eyebrows.

"Right... _hypothetically_," she says with a twinkle in her eye. After a moment she eyes my hand with the picture still hidden inside.

"May I?" she asks reaching for my hand. Time seems to slow to a crawl as her fingers graze my knuckles and wrap around my fingers turning my hand over. As she pulls her hand away, clasping the photograph I can still feel the lingering tingles from her touch. I rub my thumb against my knuckles wishing it was hers.

Her eyes crinkle whilst she looks at the picture. "Is this you or Ems?"

_Pfft! How do I answer that? _"It's... Emily."

She looks up from the picture to me and then back down several times. "Huh. You _do_ look alike," she concludes.

"Nothing gets passed you, does it?" I chuckle.

"Well, I _am_ rather clever if I do say so myself," she says without the hint of modesty. "So who's the chick then?"

"Oh. Just a friend..." I answer casually.

She looks at the picture again. "Yeah, a friend she wants to bone."

I burst out laughing, "God, Naomi!"

"What? It's true!" she says earnestly.

"What makes you say that?" I ask crossing my arms.

She points down to the picture. "Look at Ems' body language – she's turned _into_ her."

"And that means she wants to shag her, does it?"

Naomi shrugs. "Shame, about the girl though."

"What do you mean? What about her?"

"Look here," she points again, "see how she's pulled away, even with her arm around her shoulder? She doesn't feel the same."

I take the picture from her and examine it. Naomi's right – Presley is pulled away, almost as if holding back. I swallow back the lump slowly forming in the back of my throat. "Yeah, I guess."

"You alright Katie?" I continue looking at the picture trying to find any other clues into how Presley may feel.

"Katie!" Naomi says louder.

"Shit, sorry," I say shaking my head.

"You okay?" she asks.

"Yeah, yeah. Of course," I say looking back at her.

She takes back the picture. "Shame though," she repeats.

"What is?"

"Well this girl obviously doesn't realize she was batting way above her average, does she?" she says as she throws the picture over her shoulder landing somewhere behind the bed. "What?" she asks at seeing the expression on my face.

"You realize every time you compliment Emily, you compliment me too, yeah?"

"Ugh," she rolls her eyes, "don't remind me."

I smile at her. "_You_ think I'm pretty," I state firmly.

"I think _Emily_ is pretty."

"We're twins," I deadpan.

"Yes, well _she's_ the more attractive twin."

"And your basing this off of seeing one picture?"

"Yes. Why do you have any more?" she asks with interest.

I grudgingly reach over to the nightstand and hand over the picture of us on holiday. She looks down at the photograph and examines it. When she goes to lift up her head I place a hand gently on her hair. "No, don't look back at me for reference. Point out the 'more attractive' twin," I say mockingly.

"Fine," she says as she points.

I take my hand away from the crown of her head and sit next to her, looking at her pointed finger.

"Her – _she's_ the most attractive twin."

I smile. "I quite agree."

"Wait, is that one you?" she asks.

_Technically... _"Um..."

"Well?"

"You just pointed to Emily," I say in a defeated tone.

A satisfied smile comes across her face. "I knew it!" she exclaims triumphantly.

"Don't look so pleased with yourself," I scold.

"You're just mad I didn't choose you," she says in a sing-song tone.

I roll my eyes, "Yes, I'm _terribly_ heartbroken you chose Ems over me."

She pats my leg, "It'll be hard, but you'll get through it."

"Fuck off!"

After we both laugh there is an awkward pause that we both try to fill at the same time.

"So-"

"Are-"

Naomi gestures to me, "Sorry, you were saying?"

"Um, so I was just wondering. I mean I think you pretty much insinuated it, but I don't want to be an ass and just assume I know the answer. Which of course you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I mean, I won't care either way..."

She raises her hand to stop me. "I think I know what you're going to ask, and I'll happily tell you. The answer is no," she says decidedly.

"No?" I ask with furrowed brows. "I could have sworn... I mean, I thought-"

"I know, I know," she interrupts, "It's a _very_ believable dye job, but it is not in fact my natural hair color." She looks at me and raises an eyebrow, "That _is_ what you were going to ask me, yeah?"

"...right, yeah."

"Well now you know," she says simply holding her hands in her lap. As I continue to look at her in confusion she begins to shake slightly. She moves her arms to clutch to her sides as the laughter finally escapes her. "Your face," she laughs. "Oh my god, classic."

I try and shove her off the bed. "You're taking the piss again!"

She holds her arms out in front of her against my own as I continue to push her. Her arms begin to slacken as her energy weakens from the laughter. I gain advantage on her and before she slips off the bed, I pull her towards me. She is still laughing as we both tumble back onto the bed finally causing me to laugh.

Once we've both gotten a hold of ourselves, she pushes off of me and lays down on her side, propping her head up on her elbow. I arrange myself opposite her mimicking her position.

"That was far easier than it should have been. I didn't take you to be so gullible. And actually, I would have thought you would just ask me plainly."

"Yeah, well, maybe you don't know me as well as you think you do," I sniff smugly.

"Touche," she says relenting.

"So... answer the question."

"Yeah, I'm gay," the blonde says, waiting for a reaction.

I adjust my position once more, sitting cross-legged. "Okay, thank you for telling me."

"That's it?"

"What else is there?" I ask.

"Well I was expecting at least one lesbian dig?" She gets up into a sitting position of her own, hanging her legs off the side of the bed. "Kinda disappointed actually - I was anticipating some great big flurry of insults."

"I'm just _full_ of surprises," I say conspiratorially.

Naomi, smiles back at me and nods, "Yeah, you kinda are, aren't you?"

"And for the record, babes? Asking was just a formality really. The shoes were a dead giveaway," I say in a very good Katie impersonation, flicking at her Chucks. "I honestly don't understand what it is with you lezzers and your bloody shoes. It's like you lot get a free pair of these monstrosities when you come out."

Naomi laughs. "And so it begins..."

* * *

**Letter from Emily to Naomi:**

_Naomi,_

_Yes, you __are__ a tit... but I was a bigger one. I shouldn't have said those things to you._

_Let me ask you something... you say I'm different but assure me that it's not in a bad way, right? So? Why question it? I guess the only thing that I can tell you is that I'm just being __me__._

_Listen, this is going to sound weird but I'm going to say it anyways – so please don't make me regret it, yeah? I don't make friends easily. I know, I know, try and hide your shock, but it's true. It's something that I'm supposed to be working on. I guess maybe I thought, that I could try – you know, with you? I'm going to stop now before this gets any more lame._

_Katie_

_P.S. Um, yes she is?_

_P.P.S. If you tell anyone about this or even mention it to me, I will systematically torture every one you love including your cat – if you have one. In the event you don't, I will purchase one for you, and delay my torture for after you've fallen in love with it._

* * *

**A/N:**

**Be ****_honest_****... how many of you are currently wearing Chucks?**

**So I'm not sure about the pacing in this chapter and was really tempted to chuck the whole thing out and start new, but decided to leave it. Hopefully it doesn't disappoint. I know a lot of you have been waiting patiently for Emily's return. Thanks for sticking with me. In Naomi's words, 'and so it begins...'**

**Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas, a very belated Happy Hanukkah and... all the other holidays that I missed. I blame the piss poor American school system. **

**Thank you for your reviews! Oh and if you've left a review as a guest, log in or create an account so I can thank you properly!**

**xx, tinderbliss**


	7. While You Were Away

**A/N:**

**Alright, a couple of warnings before I begin. One for... sensitive subject matter, I guess? I don't really think there's anything that will offend anyone, but in the spirit of full disclosure I warn you that there's the mention of death and a death certificate - none of which is graphic. Secondly a warning of the smut variety. But, perhaps not the smut that you lot may be wanting. This is an official hetero smut warning. Now, before you continue a third and final warning. I do *not* write smut. I never have and I find the whole thing to be weird. Not because I'm uncomfortable with sex but because I struggle with descriptive writing - something that is a bit vital to smut. So if you're looking for some high quality smut, allow me to direct you to the likes of ****_mynameislizzie_****, ****_garden-nomes_**** or ****_hypes_**** and the slew of others that do this far better than I do.**

**Up next: Katie finds herself in quite the pickle. Naomi tries to forget the pickle. Emily contemplates the pickle that is Naomi. And Effy? Well, she enjoys herself a rather large pickle. **

* * *

**Katie's POV - ****_Grayson's_**

"For fuck's sake," I mumble as I rifle through the small wardrobe containing Emily's clothes. Scowling, I put on the recently pressed school uniform taking care to tuck the blouse into the skirt just as my sister would. After styling (and really, I use the word rather generously – this _is_ Emily we're talking about) my hair into a ponytail I inspect my reflection in the mirror. _Not bad... _

Making my way towards the dining hall, I smile at the passing girls who greet me along the way whilst rolling my eyes internally. When I brought up the idea of pulling a Fitch Switch I was in such a desperate state of mind, I really hadn't considered all that it would entail. Primarily how hard it would be to "play" Emily. She throws about smiles and general niceties on the regular. And it's just not my way - it's not at _all_ who I am. I mean, why waste the energy... why put effort into people who don't matter? And therein lies our biggest differences I suppose.

It all seemed so much easier when we were kids. _She_ was so much easier in those days... more _pliable_. She was my ever constant shadow following me about and more importantly listening to me. She's changed though. Like she's grown a backbone or something. In fact if it didn't impact me so much I might even be impressed.

I'm not sure when it happened really. Her changing I mean. I suppose when she came out? I don't know... it all seems like such a long time ago. Somewhere along the way, she stopped depending on me – stopped needing me. Now it's like she has this whole different life, a life apart from me. I continue along the corridor, adjusting my jumper at the shiver that takes hold of me. _Don't be stupid, Katie – you could never be apart from her, not really. She'd never abandon you._

Finding myself in the dining hall, I find Presley and Lexie at our old table and settle in Emily's usual spot. The girls are already tucking into their breakfast and discussing the latest in the Grayson's gossip mill.

"I'm still not sure I believe it," Presley says as she smiles to me in greeting. "What do _you_ think Ems?"

Prepare my BAFTA... "About what?" I ask returning her smile before taking a sip of the orange juice she offers me.

Lexie shakes her head incredulously, "...about Miss Wick and Miss Clarke... you _know_...?" she finishes with a pointed look.

"Eww... you can't mean they..." I falter, "I mean they're so... _old_."

A scrunched up look occupies Lexie's face. "Not to mention, you know... the _obvious," _she says pointedly. "_So_ gross. I mean, is it even appropriate for them to be teaching at a _girls'_ _school_?"

Interesting. Didn't peg Lexie as a bigot. I wonder if Emily knows this about her friend. They never did seem that close – but _still_, Lexie's definitely in her circle of friends. Presley has gone noticeably quiet, quickly shoving a large fork full of sausage into her mouth. Heh. Gotta love the irony there. _Okay, Katie, focus. How would Emily respond? _

"Bit archaic, don't you think?"

"What do you mean?" Lexie asks with furrowed brows.

Chancing a glance at Presley, I continue using Emily's 'teacher voice.' "Your way of thinking, it's so-"

I am interrupted by a look of dawning on Lexie's face. "Shit, Presley - I'm sorry! I'm such a shit friend. I totally forgot about all the rumors about you. Well, there's really no need to worry - _no one_ actually believes anything that Katie said. No one thinks you're a _lesbian._"

Presley's face cringes at the word. "Right... well, good," she says whilst getting up from the table. "Listen, I still have to get my books before class, I'll see you guys in a bit."

I'm immediately torn between going after Presley to see if she's okay or laying into Lexie. I can easily see Emily doing either, but the nurturer in her would probably go check on Presley. I settle on throwing a disapproving look at Lexie before going after the blonde that fucked my life to bits.

I find her crying into the pillows on her bed. Ugh, I really fucking hate tears. I linger at the door before closing it with a little more force than I intend to. Presley looks up from her pillows, and smiles sadly at me. I grab a box of tissues from a side table and hand them to her.

"Is this how it is, Ems?" she says motioning her head towards the door.

I sit down next to her and sigh. "Not all the time, no."

Presley wipes her face with the tissues and shakes her head. "I don't know how you did it... how you _do_ it. How you're _so brave_."

_Huh. Yeah, she is, isn't she? Brave. More than I'll ever be anyway. _I can't help but feel a bit of pride for Ems, and smile. "Well, it's not easy – not with people like Lexie-"

"And Katie," she deadpans wiping a tear away furiously.

"I'm not-" I stop myself and take a breath. "Katie doesn't see me the way Lexie does... she doesn't _feel_ that way."

"How can you say that? After all she's done?" she questions.

I push myself off the bed and turn my back to her. "It's hard to explain, okay?"

After several moments of silence I hear her walk towards me and entwine her fingers into mine, spinning me around to face her.

"Ems, I don't want to fight about this again. I promised you I would try – really, try – to be understanding about your sister. I guess it's just harder than I thought it would be." She moves her hands around my waist and pulls me closer to her. "I'll try harder, okay?" she says with a smile. I then find myself against her fully as she leaves a chaste kiss on my lips . _Uh, right._

I take a step back. "Well, good, I'm glad. We should head to class though," I say nodding towards the door, "we don't want to be late."

Presley must not approve of my newly gained distance and moves towards me with a predatory smile, "We have a few minutes..." she says as she presses me into the wall, hands on either side of me before shoving her tongue down my throat.

* * *

**Naomi's POV - ****_Delfino House_**

"What's the worst that can happen?" Effy asks with a cheeky glint in her eyes as we enter the group room which has quickly been appropriated as our sort of hideaway.

Now, whilst it's true I don't remember much of what happened the other night when I had my fit or whatever, I am very plainly aware that it bares consequences. Up until this point, I've tried to push it out of my mind. Unfortunately, like everything else that I try to ignore or forget, it all seems to come around, doesn't it? I haven't any idea of what form said consequences will take, but I can freely admit, it's not something I'm looking forward to finding out. But find out I will at today's appointment with Delfino's answer to Freud.

"That's precisely what I'd like to know," I answer zipping up my hoodie and sitting down on the floor against the wall, legs stretched out before me.

Effy sits next to me, her bony knee pressing into my thigh. "You really want to know?"

I roll my eyes spectacularly in answer. Sometimes she can be exhausting. For once I would love for her to answer a question directly.

"Simmer down Campbell – just give me a minute, alright?"

"I didn't realize I'd asked a particularly difficult question. What's there to think about?"

Effy regards me with amusement. "If you _must_ know I'm working out possible outcomes. You want to know _the worst_ that can happen, right? Well, gimme a sec."

I grumble a 'fine' and curl and flex my toes in boredom. After several minutes of attempting to bend my big toe without bending the others – and failing miserably – I feel Effy elbow me in the ribs.

"Do I really inspire so much violence in others that everyone sees fit to batter me?"

"Oh, is someone else violating you?" Effy asks with a quirked eyebrow. "I'm jealous," she pouts.

"Fuck off, Eff," I say as I rub my side.

She smiles a knowing smile before shaking her head at my eye rolling. I open my mouth to fend off any coming accusations before she raises her hand silently halting me. "They'll be time to discuss that little gem, but first things first – your appointment with Foster."

I sigh with the overwhelming feeling that I won't like what she has to say.

* * *

"Naomi, how are you feeling today?"

I swing my legs below me on the leather chair across from Dr. Foster. "To be honest, Doc I've been feeling rather tired lately."

Foster nods as takes down a note in his book. "What do you think is making you so tired?"

"_Welllll_... if it's not all the sex then it must be the drugs. Hard to say, really."

He chuckles freely and points his pen at me. "I'm glad to see you're in such a playful mood today. It suits you. Now, if I might steer the conversation to a bit more of a serious note?"

"If you must."

Foster smiles. "Can you tell me about what happened during the film last week?"

I don't trust easily – I think that much is clear by now – but I've found myself trusting fully in the enigmatic brunette I met just a short week ago. She knows Delfino House as well as anyone can, I suspect, and so I'll do exactly as she urged me to do today.

"I was a bit stressed, I think," I answer before hastily adding, "but I feel better now."

The doctor nods before asking, "Has anything like this episode happened before? This... 'stress'?"

A deep sigh escapes, "Not like that, no."

"Naomi, I wonder if you would share with me what led up to that moment?"

When his answer is met with silence he continues. "You don't trust me yet, Naomi, I understand that. You don't know me and you're expected to share deeply personal things with me. It must be difficult."

"And yet you continue prying into my business..."

"Quite right. I would be a pretty lousy psychiatrist if I didn't though, wouldn't I?"

"So being nosy is all part of the job, eh?"

He smiles, "An occupational hazard, I'm afraid."

I nod and look out the window across the room. It's a rather pretty day out. When my gaze returns to the doctor he has a finger on his chin.

"Naomi, I wonder if you'd like to play a game with me?"

Oh God, is this the part where he whips out his schlong and asks to play 'hide the pickle'? My face must reflect my abject disgust as he clears his throat and continues.

"For every question you answer, you may ask me one. What do you think?"

I narrow my eyes at him. "I can ask you _anything_ and you'll answer _honestly_?"

"That's correct. My only stipulation is that it works both ways - you must answer my questions honestly. Do we have a deal?" He asks with an outstretched hand.

I suppose if I have to talk to him, I might as well get something out of it in return. "Fine," I say as I shake his hand once and lean back into the chair looking at him expectantly.

"Who is Sophia Moore?"

_Well, shit. Right for the 'nads, huh? _"The fact that you're asking me this question, that you even know her name at all shows me that you know exactly who she is... who she was."

"Naomi, I'm happy to share everything I know about Sophia if that's the question you'd like to ask me, but as we agreed just a minute ago, you must answer the question before you may ask me one."

I cross my arms, looking at the coffee table separating us. "She's just a girl I met last Summer. We hung out for a bit. She died. End of."

"Come now, Naomi – you can do better than that. You promised to be honest."

I clench my teeth and take a deep breath. "We met at an Open Day. She was different... honest. We became friends I guess," I shrug. "She... she wanted more. From me, you know? But, it wasn't like that – not _really_."

"Surely there's more?"

"Perhaps there is, but I've already answered your question. I believe it's my turn now."

"So it is," he motions for me to continue, "What would you like to know, Naomi?"

"Tell me everything you know about Sophia," I say simply.

"Well, there's quite a lot. Most of my information comes from what I've gathered from the police file and from what your mother has shared. Of course, I think the one person who could _really_ tell me about Sophia is you."

"You. Didn't. Answer. The. Question." I all but growl.

Doctor Foster gets up from his chair and walks over to a large cabinet, removing a key from somewhere on his desk. Sliding open the drawer, he rifles through several hanging files before pulling out several official-looking kraft ones. He carries the bundle to a table situated near the window and motions for me to sit in the chair in front of it.

As I sit down, he takes the chair next to me and flips open the first file. I blink as I stare directly into her eyes. A 5x7 photograph is paper-clipped to the inside panel of the file. She's in her uniform, wearing an expression that is all too Sophia-like. This is the first time I've seen her since that night. I took great care to avoid the newspaper articles and memorials all throughout college those following weeks. Seeing her here, in a file, just staring back at me like everything is okay is just... wrong. So wrong. I unclasp the photograph and allow myself to look at it one last time before I return it to the file intentionally clipping it backwards. I focus my attention to the first page of the file. Her death certificate. I blink back tears that threaten to fall from my traitorous eyes, before flipping to the next page.

* * *

**Effy's POV – ****_Delfino House_**

The restroom nearest the common room has seen better days, somehow escaping the mass renovations Delfino underwent several years ago. Both residents and staff alike avoid the room favoring the modern furnishings found elsewhere throughout the estate. Some even claim it's haunted – no doubt perpetuated by the ever gullible Josie. Nevertheless, it suits my needs just fine.

I close the door behind me and quirk an eyebrow at the eager boy standing in front of me with his patented shit eating grin.

"Don't look so pleased with yourself," I say as I grab onto the collar of his shirt, pulling him forcefully into me, our lips crashing together. He invades my mouth with his dominating tongue as he grabs the back of my neck, deepening our kiss. Using his other hand, he lifts up my shirt to roughly palm my tit. I moan into his mouth with encouragement. Cook then grabs my hips and pushes me backward into the sink, continuing to kiss me. When I feel him lifting up my dress, hands resting on my ass I push against his chest, stopping our kiss. "You have to pull out," I say firmly, pointing a finger into his chest. "Yeah, yeah, babes alright," he says kissing my neck. "How do you want it then Eff?"

This is why I love Cook, so uncomplicated in so many ways. I smile in response knowing that he needn't ask... he already knows the answer. I tuck my fingers into the waistband of my underwear and pull them down, shrugging them from around my ankles.

He laughs at my smirking face and wastes no time in taking my hand and placing it on his already hardened cock. I turn around looking at our reflections in the mirror. "Go on then," I say challengingly.

Cook shakes his head delightfully as he pulls his pants and underwear down, lifting up my dress. Pressing me forward so I'm in a leaning position, hands clasped to the sink in front of me, I feel him push his considerable length and girth inside of me. He lets out a groan at the initial contact. "Always, ready for me, aren't you love?" I hum in response as I push myself back into him. Taking the hint he increases his rhythm until we're both biting our lips to keep from sounding like one of those 'mating in the wild' documentaries.

I look at my knuckles which have gone white as I clutch onto the sink, stabilizing myself at the continued thrusts behind me. Cook grabs my hips and forces me onto his dick so that our opposing directions cause a deliciously intense sensation. I close my eyes, leaning my head down, focusing on all the stimulation, feeling myself relax into his very capable hands.

Cook is many things – one of which is a fantastic fuck. He knows exactly how to get me off and does so without question or preamble. Knowing instinctively what I want, he wraps his arm around my stomach pulling me into a standing position. He looks at my reflection in the mirror, never stopping his thrusting, pulls down the top of my dress to grab my breasts – alternating between pinching almost painfully so before rubbing them with a flat hand. I moan and he places kisses onto my neck in answer. When I feel his hands travel off my tits and trail down my sides I look into the mirror and smile at him. His right hand reaches my cunt, fingers finding my clit in short order, rubbing small, tight circles into my most sensitive spot.

I feel myself getting closer and closer to release, and allow my eyes to close in ecstasy.

"Uh-uh, babes, look at me," Cook grunts as his left hand wraps around my neck and holds my head upright, looking directly into the mirror. He then intensifies his machinations on my clit along with his deep thrusting. "I want you to see yourself when you cum," he growls and presses into me ever further. Just when I feel my orgasm hit, he moves his hand from my neck to my cover my mouth. I grab his hand, keeping it against my face as I all but scream into it, body shaking with a shattering orgasm.

When the last bits of shock have wracked my body, I lean my head back into him, removing his hand from my mouth and sigh the sigh of the deeply sated. "Nice one, Cook," I say with a smirk at his reflection in the mirror.

"I aim to please. Speaking of aiming, babes?" he says pointing in the direction of his dick.

"Alright Cookie boy, I _suppose_ you deserve it," I say as I turn around and get on my knees before him.

Yes, I do love this bathroom.

* * *

**Emily's POV – **_**Delfino House**_

It's not like I'm intentionally avoiding the common room or anywhere else Naomi might be, it's just that I felt like some alone time – is what I tell myself. This morning I woke up from bed to find the photograph of me and Presley lying carelessly on the floor. At some point last night I completely forgot about her, that is until Naomi took it upon her very clever self to analyze our body language. Now I can't stop looking at the picture. I keep trying to think of the moments right before and directly after it was taken. What reasons are there for her to be 'pulled away'? For starters, her hesitance to actually come out. Secondly, all the shit people will start on after they realize Katie was right about what she accused her of. And I'm sure a slew of other reasons. It's just I thought we were making progress. I can't help but thinking that if Katie and I hadn't switched this week then this wouldn't be happening. I wouldn't be dissecting every detail of this fucking picture and my mind wouldn't be preoccupied with Naomi (the blonde that is most certainly _not_ my girlfriend and is definitely in a mental hospital but is decidedly hot and _totally_ lust worthy.) But then I realize that I wouldn't have met, _really met _Naomi and somehow I think that maybe it's a fair trade. Which is silly really.

In fact all of this is silly. So, I have a little crush on Naomi... _so what_? Not a big deal. Next week I'll be back at Grayson's, back with Presley and we'll surely sort out whatever insecurities I've developed since being away from her. Katie will return to Delfino and halt any chemistry that may or may not be mutual with Naomi. If it's one thing I know, it's that Katie will not put up with any lezza shenaniggans. So once I return to Delfino the following week, the vibes will be different, and things will all go back to normal. I sigh happily. Yes, it will all be fine. It will all sort itself. So I suppose there's really no harm in hanging out with her in the mean time though. I mean, it's just a few more days.

* * *

**Certificate of Death**

_Department of Health Services_

**Decedent's Personal Data**

**Name of Decedent:** _Sophia A. Moore_

**Date of Birth:** _03.03.1992_

**Date of Death: **_12.07.2009_

**Sex/Gender:** _Female_

**Decedent's Race:** _Caucasian_

**Occupation:** _Minor/Student_

**Local Registrar**

**Name of Funeral Establishment:** _Oldhams-Williams Funeral Home _

**License Number:** _FD-916_

**Place of Death**

**Place of Death:** _Private Residence of Gina Campbell_

**If Hospital, Specify; DOA, OR/ER or TP:** _DOA_

**Cause of Death**

**Immediate Cause of Death **(final disease or condition resulting in death)**: **_Gunshot wound to the head_

**Sequentially, list conditions of any leading to cause Line A **(disease or injury that initiated the events resulting in death)** last: ******_Boyfriend of deceased grew increasing hostile and paranoid following continued domestic disputes culminating in a murder-suicide - shot by a short range handgun following dispute_****

**Other Significant Conditions Contributing to death but not resulting in the underlying cause given in Line A: **_N/A_

**Coroner's Use Only**

**Manner of Death; Natural, Accident, Homicide, Suicide, Pending Investigation, Could Not Determine:** _Homicide_

**Place of Injury: **_Private_ _Residence of Gina Campbell_

**Describe How Injury Occurred **(events which resulted in injury)**:** _Shot by one Philip Aimes using a short range handgun following domestic dispute – perpetrator then committed suicide._

**Signature of Coroner: **_Alice Clayworth_

**Date: **_13.07.2009_

**Name and Title of Coroner/Deputy Coroner:** _Alice Clayworth, Deputy Coroner_

_I certify that in my opinion death occurred at the hour, date and place stated from the causes stated._

* * *

**A/N:**

**My apologies for the longer than usual wait on this chapter. Prior to a fair bit of editing this chapter included a shit ton of content that I hadn't planned for - things that would have taken the story in another direction, or perhaps an added direction. In any event, it had to go. I promised y'all I'd get this train moving and can't do that when I let my fingers type away and stray from my story map. Bad fingers. Anyhow, I ****_did_**** save the bit I wrote and may do a little 3-shot prequel to ITR - although, not until this bitch of a story is finished! When all is said and done, it should be around 20 chapters or so. Hang tight, yeah?**

**So things have been kinda dead around here lately, huh? Thanks to ****_tiffythetitan_**** for the great fic recommendations. Anyone else have any? **

**xx,**

**tinderbliss**


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